The Breaking Point
by engravingwordswiththornsofrose
Summary: With the death of her parents tearing her apart, Hermione's not sure she can handle much more. But when love drags her into an unwanted war, she realizes lifes a game of chess with Severus and herself as the last pieces left on the board.
1. Chapter 1

The room was dark. Pitch black to be exact. There was no moonlight to creep through the window; nothing to cast shadows around the room. Hermione felt truly alone; the way she wanted it. One of the large windows was open just a crack allowing the cool November air to lick her bare legs as she sat on the window bench in her night gown. The view of the lake was beautiful, even without the moon, but Hermione didn't notice. Her forehead pressed against the clear glass, she breathed in the fresh night air trying to relax.

Sleep wasn't an option. She was all out of the dreamless sleep potion she had brewed the week before and the nightmares just kept appearing in her mind whether she was awake or not. There was nothing to stop them, and they never seemed to get any better. It was always the same scene, ever since the summer. She would be walking home after a day in the park, and when she arrived at her house the door was slightly ajar. She'd pull out her wand and push the door open to find her parents lying motionless on the living room floor. The house was ransacked, furniature and objects all over the floor but her parents just lying there. Lifeless.

A single tear fell down her cheek as her head remained pressed against the glass. She blamed herself for it all. If she wasn't apart of this order this would never have happened. They were looking for Hermione; her parents were just casualties. If she wasn't a witch, her parents would still be alive.

Her stomach growled gently in almost a pleading manner. It had been days since she ate something decent. Harry and Ron had stopped trying to force her food a while back, so now she ate only when she felt like it, which wasn't often. Hermione was used to body pains. The lack of proper sleep gave her headaches all of the time, and her stomach hurt quite often from the lack of nutrition. She learned to ignore it, or embrace it; at least the pain meant she was alive.

A chill ran over her body from the cold breeze and she shut the window. The students in their dorm slept soundly in their beds and Hermione was jealous. She was given her own private room on account of the screaming that would occur when she did have the dream. The other students didn't understand how she felt; she couldn't connect with them anymore. She was isolated from everyone, even her best friends. She just didn't feel like holding conversations about pointless things like Quidditch, or whoever the new celebrity wizard-of-the-day was. It all seemed so trivial compared to what was really going on in the world.

She grabbed a book off of her night table and went to sit in the common room. She figured a book she's read twenty times over and the heat of the fire combined could help her get some shut eye. No sooner had she flipped through a couple of pages that her eyes shut and she was thrown into the nightmare. She tossed and turned, a cold sweat dripping down her face, when suddenly she felt a sharp shaking of hands on her shoulders. "

"Hermione, wake up!" Her eyes snapped open in a fearful gasp to see a red-headed boy inches from her face shaking her roughly. "Breakfast is in twenty minutes, and you need to eat," he told her, though the concern in his voice proved that wasn't the reason he woke her.

"Oh thanks," she smiled and brushed her hair back with her hand.

"Are you gonna be alright?" Ron asked, helping her up off the couch.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I was just doing some last minute studying for the potions test today, and I must have drifted off," she laughed lightly to herself as she headed towards the stairs. "I'll see you at breakfast."

As she entered her room, she closed the door behind her and leaned against it for support. She was exhausted, and unsure of how much longer she could pull this off. She needed to make another sleep potion, and fast. For now, however, she would have to suffice with a shower to wake her up. Her first class was potions, and as she reminded Ron, there was a test.

Hermione turned on the shower to let the water warm and undressed herself. She stood in front of the long mirror behind the door and just stared wearily. She had become so thin, and her hair long. She cut it at shoulder-length over the summer, but it grew quickly and straightened out into light waves rather than her old bushy curls.

She had no intention of going to the great hall at all this morning. The last place she wanted to be was in a room filled with hundreds of chattering children, but she had told Ron she would go. She knew if she didn't show, it would just be a reason for her friends to worry and further pursue her to tell them how she felt. She hated feelings, they only caused problems.

She hurried her shower, grabbed her books, and made it to the great hall in under thirty minutes. It proved pointless to assume that this would have woken her up anymore than she was previous, and if it had the bags under her eyes gave her away instantly despite the amount of makeup she tried to cover them with. She sat down in the empty spot beside Harry, and blankly at the plate her friends had filled for you.

"We wanted you to get some food before Ron ate it all," a small red-haired girl smacked her brother beside her. "Just eat something Hermione. A few bites doesn't hurt."

The group of friends watched her with baited breath. She stared lamely at them all, picked up a piece of toast and had a bite. Instantly they all relaxed. Hermione had to admit, the feeling of the food in her stomach was amazing. She just got full so easily lately that she wasn't able to eat very much. After a few pieces of fruit, and two slices of bread, her stomach felt as if she had engulfed a turkey feast. She made some dumb excuse of having to do last minute studying and rushed out of the great hall, leaving her friends to exchange uncertain glances.

She arrived to class early and sat against the stone wall next to the potion master's room. She found it sad that she would prefer leaning against cold rock rather than spend time with the ones who are supposed to be there for her. She knew they were there anytime she needed somebody to talk to but she just preferred being alone. "It's easier to rely on yourself," her mother always said. "People come and go, but the only person your with forever, is you." Hermione shut her eyes and braced herself trying not to cry at the thought of her mother's words. The cold of the wall felt soothing on the back of her head and she tried hard to focus on only that.

She always tried to find distractions from her world. Little things would work. A spider weaving a web, or her cat's light purrs. She was desperate to escape the confines of her mind with anything, and everything. She even took to jogging in the evenings on the outskirts of the grounds. She would focus solely on the pattern of her footsteps and how they would need to match the pattern of her breath. It was the one thing she felt she had full control on.

"Miss Granger, have they kicked you out of your dormitory so that you must use my hallway as your sleeping quarters?" A deep voice drawled and Hermione cursed in her head. Nothing like good old sarcasm to start off the morning.

She opened her eyes and looked up. A tall man with long black hair and dark robed loomed over her. A mocking sneer, that she so desperately wanted to smack off, was plastered on his face. She took a deep breath, and rubbed her forehead as she stood. "Sorry Professor."

"In case you were wondering, my classroom isn't a lounge either," he spat and walked into the room, his robes trailing behind him.

Sometimes she really wanted to hit him. He was always so rude to everyone, and in her state her patience was close to none. She didn't need some cynical death eater mocking her to add on to her list of reasons to hate life. Reluctantly she followed him in to the classroom and took her seat in the back row, glaring at him until student began filing into the room.

"Now class," Snape instructed. "On page 45 in your text there is a very simple potion that, if done right, one drop will ignite a small ever-burning flame. You have one hour."

Hermione watched him with disdain as he walked behind his desk and picked up a jar of what looked like a pickled brain and examined it. She had done this potion a few times before and was confident that she could get it done quickly, and head to the library for a short nap.

Half an hour later she finished putting in the ingredients and was letting it brew for five more. She rested her head on her desk and closed her eyes only for a second before the over-grown bat was leaning over casting an unwanted shadow.

"I expect you to come to my class rested and ready to work Miss Granger. Lacking a life and reading the entirety of the course text on your time is not an excuse to sleep while the rest of the class does what is expected of them." He continued to loom as she lifted her head.

"The potion is finished sir," she stirred the cauldron once. "Besides I wasn't sleeping, you never gave me a chance for that."

The room around got eerily silent. It wasn't often that a student stepped up to the menacing Snape, and even more shocking that Hermione Granger would speak to him, let alone any teacher, in that manner. "Fifteen points from Gryffindor for your arrogance Miss Granger." He glanced into her potion adding, "and detention tonight here, at seven thirty."

"For what?" She stood up nearly knocking the table over, and the potion's master swiftly caught the half-full cauldron before it fell onto the ground and set the entire class ablaze.

"For being an arrogant, clumsy and stupid girl who can't even seem to make a simple ever-blaze potion right," he sneered and his voice cut her like ice.

"What are you talking about? I did it right!" She yelled back in his face, her chest heaving in anger.

"Oh really Miss Granger, and tell me, does the book say the potion should be yellow? I didn't think it did. What you've created is a useless batch of acid that will just burn a hole through the ground before it does anything pointful. Now get out of my room before you destroy the classroom with your incompetence," he spat at her, his face so threateningly close.

Hermione breathed deeply fighting back tears welling up inside her. She won't let him see her cry; she won't give him that pleasure. She grabbed her books and stalked to the door as quick as possible, however as she made her escape he called her name.

"Hemione." She paused in her step, refusing to turn as tears rolled down her cheek, and waited for him to finish. "Seven thirty in my office." She slammed the dungeon door and ran down the stone hall.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey, thanks to all those who supported the first chapter. I'm glad you like it far enough to get to the second! If you do like it, or even if you don't, leave a review and tell me how you feel :) Please and thanks! Carry on.

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Chapter 2

Severus watched his student leave the room in anger. In the seven years he has taught her, he's never seen her this way. The normally intellectually obnoxious yet awkwardly bubbly student he saw in his classroom every day had become this dark and empty shell. He knew that she could do the potion, but a lot of what she was making now a days wasn't up to her normal standards.

Maybe he had been a little hard on her. It wasn't her fault that he was in a terrible mood. He had a meeting with the Dark Lord the previous evening and didn't return until early that morning. He didn't sleep, and he was grumpy. Of course, he shouldn't have to put up with the incompetence of children, but he was a teacher, and she wasn't a child. She had experienced more horror in one summer than most of the student's in the school will in the entirety lives. She had grown up so much in the last few years, not just mentally but physically as well. He could remember back to when she was an insufferable little know-it-all first year with bushy brown hair. However, since then she had grown into a woman, her hair had straightened out, her body had filled itself out a little, and she really was quite a catch.

Besides, her incompetence wasn't really her fault. He knew of her parent's death that summer; all of the teachers had been informed at the start of the year but he didn't realize it was this bad. He had lost many through his years and he dealt with it well enough. A slight pang hit him in the chest that moment and a voice came in his head. _Not everybody is like you Severus._

He looked around and realized the class was still watching either him or the door, whispers and murmurs between them. "What are you sitting there for? Finish your potions!" He boomed, the class instantly following his orders. He strode towards his desk, sat down, flipped open the first book he saw and pretended to read. However, as hard as he tried he couldn't concentrate on the little words in front of him; his mind kept drifting towards the brown haired mess that he just kicked out of his room. He would talk to her tonight during her detention; he made a mental note.

"Incompetent? I'm incompetent?" Hermione was yelling to nobody in particular as she stormed through the halls trying her very best to calm down. "I make one stupid mistake on one stupid potion and suddenly I'm incompetent?"

She had no idea where she was going. She didn't think it was anywhere in particular, she was just sort of.. walking. Almost at a sprint, but walking. Tears fell down her cheek and she wasn't bothered to wipe them away. Everyone was in class, so nobody would see her. She must have been about half way down the fourth floor corridor when she heard a voice she hated even more than her horrible professor's.

"Hey, Mudblood. Where do you think your going?"

She tried to ignore the blonde-haired boy and continued to walk. Her pace picking up even more, if that was possible.

"Hey Granger, you will listen when I talk to you." She felt a hand on her shoulder and she spun around.

"What the fuck do you want Malfoy?" Her eyes were icy but that didn't seem to stir the boy a single bit.

"Is that any way to speak to your superiors?" He smirked the same stupid glare Snape was so famous for. Must be a Slytherin thing. "Besides, since when does teacher's pet Miss Perfect skip class? Naughty naughty Miss Granger," he mocked a teacher's tone and, although he was talking to her, his eyes were looking elsewhere on her body.

"Don't touch me," she slapped his still-resting hand off her shoulder. "Mind your own business Malfoy, and go bother somebody who gives a shit." Hermione really didn't know what was up with her, and at this point she didn't care. This wasn't her usual take-it-and-go mannerism but she really just didn't want to be bothered. Especially by a rat.

Draco's eyes darkened, and his smirk paused as a frown but was quickly replaced by a thin smile. "People like you, don't tell people like me what to do Granger. You should know your place by now," he grabbed the front of her robes and threw her up against the wall pinning her body with his. "But maybe I should remind you."

"Get off me!" She screamed and struggled underneath his weight.

He chuckled lightly at her. "Nothing but a weak, and stupid little..."

"MALFOY," A voice boomed near the end of the hall and they both paused to see a tall thin witch with green robes frozen in place. Her face was filled with shock and anger. "You release Miss Granger this instant!"

He instantly let go and Hermione stumbled away. "We were only playing, professor," he smiled at his transfiguration teacher. "Isn't that right Granger?"

Hermione stood there speechless, and shaking. After a few seconds of looking between the two, she ran leaving her books strewn on the floor where they landed when he pushed her. She ran and ran as fast as she could until she reached the front entrance of the school and out onto the grounds. She had nothing but a t-shirt and jeans under her robes and it was chilly outside. The crisp fall air, though filled with the scents of wet leaves and shedding trees, was growing colder by the day as they neared the end of November.

She entered the forbidden forest still at a run and not very deep in she found the root of a tree that posed as a comfortable chair. Despite the forest being off limits for the students, over her years spent at Hogwarts, she knew that it wasn't all that dangerous in the first few miles or so. Now, nestled in the root, she drew deep relaxing breaths trying to calm herself but the events of the last hour proved to be too much. Her mind reeled in thoughts. Useless, incompetent, stupid, weak, arrogant, is that what she was? Is that all she was? She had to admit she began to agree. Her marks over the semester were lower than their usual, and even her friends began to drift away. She closed her eyes for only a moment and drifted into a fitful sleep.

She awoke several hours later to a light kicking in her side. She jumped, muffling a scream, and looked up. It was night time and the forest around her was dark. She waited a moment for her eyes to adjust to the light and found herself looking up at a tall, handsome man. Well, he sort of wasn't a man. She looked at the shining hair on his horse body and then returned her gaze to his face smiling slightly at the centaur. He smiled back, but concern was in his eyes.

"You do know your sleeping in a forest," he watched her as she stood and brushed off her robes.

"I didn't mean too. I was just getting away for a bit," she replied. "How long was I asleep?"

The centaur looked up into the night sky. The trees were thin where they were standing so the stars and moon were still visible. "The day is in it's fourth quarter. For you, that is about eight o'clock."

"Oh, okay thanks," she said awkwardly and looked around. "The exit to the forest..."

"Is that way. Let me escort you. The forest is not safe at night," he offered and lead the way. After about fifteen minutes of walking, Hermione reached the edge of the castle's grounds and thanked the centaur for his help. She was late for her detention, but didn't really care. She wasn't planning on going anyways; no reason to endure another hour of hearing how pathetic she was.

Entering the castle she decided to head for the astronomy tower. It would be a nice place to think with the view, and she truly didn't want to go back to the common room. She would just be questioned about why she wasn't in classes or at supper. Besides, nobody would be on the tower after class hours.

The tower was quiet, and empty as she had planned. She leaned on the edge of the balcony and stared out over the forest. She could just see a unicorn grazing on the grass at the edge of the trees, it's hair glowing a white hue. It was beautiful to watch, and Hermione found herself wishing her parents were there to see it.

Her mom had loved unicorns for as long as she could remember. When Hermione was really little, her mother gave her a tiny stuffed unicorn that she carried with her everywhere. This was before she knew they existed, but believed they did anyway. All of this was so unreal. Nobody in the muggle world knew any of this existed; they were missing so much. Hermione wished she told her mother that unicorns were real; she would have loved that.

She looked over the tower's edge towards the ground. It was so far, and so east to accidentally fall. Too easy. What if she did fall? Would anybody really care? Without thought Hermione climbed the edge and just stood, staring at the ground beneath her. So far, and so easy. She closed her eyes and balanced, breathing in the night air.

If she really wanted to, she could step off the edge. She had that control. She could just lift one foot. Slowly, Hermione raised her leg and hung it over the edge. Thoughts of her parents reeled in her mind. If she wasn't a witch, it would have never happened. They wouldn't have been a target. If she wasn't alive, she couldn't hurt anybody else.

She leaned slightly farther and took a deep breath; she was ready to accept death.

Suddenly she felt large hands grab her and pull her back onto the the tower. They both stumbled and she landed on top of whoever it was as they hit the stone floor hard. "What the hell do you think your doing?" He yelled.

She looked up into a pair of dark eyes, black hair strewn everywhere. One arm supported her back and the other held the wrist of her badly scratched hand from its contact with the ground during their fall. Just then she realized how tired she was, and she felt so dizzy. Her world went black and she was left lying there unconscious in the arms of her potions professor.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey Guys, i don't wanna have to put review or i wont update because I hate when authors do that, but please PLEASE review it. Tell me what you guys think. I wanna hear from you! :) Hope you enjoy!**

Chapter 3

She was pale in his arms, and as he rushed through the corridors carrying her, he couldn't stop staring at the young witches face. She had deep bags under her eyes, her body was frail, and she looked more bothered than he had ever seen, even as she slept. Her limp body, despite its small frame, weighed so much to Severus.

"Severus what happened?" Madame Pomfrey squealed when she saw him carrying the girl.

"It appears Miss Granger fainted in the halls presumably from lack of sleep and food," Snape informed the older witch, placing Hermione's body on the nearest bed.

Pomfrey gave him a suspicious glance, but nodded and shuffled over to the wing's medical potion cabinet. "I've got it Severus, thank you," she replied and waved him off.

"Very well Poppy," he said, taking a last glance at Hermione, turning fast, and stalking out of the hospital wing. He was glad to be out of there.

Severus walked along the dimly lit corridor towards the headmaster's office. He took deep breaths as he tried to relax. His footsteps echoed loudly and his robes trailed along the ground behind him. He rubbed his forehead slightly, unaware of the stress lines throughout his face. How dare that woman accuse him, even only with her eyes, of harming the girl. It's not as if this was his fault. He paused at that thought for a moment.

Maybe he had been too hard on her. Maybe he went a little far with what he had said. It's not like he was treating her any different than the rest of the students, though that didn't make him sound any better. He just didn't like ignorance, and arrogance was his pet peeve though it was a familiar quality in himself. But, maybe he pushed her too far.

"Sherbet Lemon," Severus said and watched the gargoyle move revealing a staircase. He always hated the words Dumbledore used as passwords, each year repeating the same sugared candy as the one previous. At least it made remembering them simple.

Severus knocked on the door sharply, and proceeded to open it. "Ah, Severus," the headmaster called, beckoning the professor over. "Come, sit down. I assume your here to inform me of Miss Granger?"

Sitting down Snape looked at the older wizard with a slight surprise. "You knew?"

"Well, yes. Lemon drop?" he replied reaching for a small tin and offering it in Severus' direction, which he declined with a slight shake of his head. "Mr. Potter had informed me of her state at the beginning of the year and, given the events of her summer, I already had my eye on her. Professor McGonagall informed earlier today of Miss Granger's encounter with Mr. Malfoy and well, it was only a matter of time."

Snape was baffled and angry. Her encounter with Mr. Malfoy? He knew of the feud between the two, and a sinking feeling was in his stomach. Draco had not been in class that day, obviously skipping the test, she must have seen him when she had left the class, and she was already to upset. He looked up at Albus with accusation in his eyes, "You knew of her case and you failed to do anything about it?"

"I was on my way to the tower, when one of the ghosts informed me you had already arrived on the scene. I hadn't wanted to steal your thunder, my boy," Dumbledore smiled, looking at the dark haired man over his half-moon spectacles.

Severus broke eye contact and looked around the room. A frown was placed firmly on his lips, though he did not realize. The room was so oddly decorated but Snape did not notice, his mind was elsewhere.

"It was not your fault Severus," Albus broke in, almost having read his thoughts.

"I was cruel to her."

"The world has been cruel to her."

He knew this was true, but he felt no better. He didn't understand. He has killed many in his life, mostly for survival, but never the less, why did he feel so bad? He wasn't even the ones who killed them and it's not as if her attempt was solely his fault. He glared downwards. He'd have to have a talk with Draco, that little...

"If you feel so terrible," Dumbledore interrupted his thoughts. "Then apologize to her, help her Severus."

"I don't feel terrible," Snape looked up, his eyes icy. "If you would excuse me headmaster, I should retire for the night. Goodnight," he nodded and retreated from the office.

Several days passed before Hermione stirred in her bed, and during those days Snape did all he could to avoid the hospital wing. He was concerned for her welfare; that was the problem. It was also in those days that his mood was worse than before, particularly towards one blonde haired student.

Word hadn't yet gotten out about the truth behind Hermione's hospitalization. Rumors had it that she fell down some stairs, others said it was a potion gone wrong. Thank merlin nobody saw Snape carrying her, or there would be worse rumors spread.

It was within two days after Hermione's faint, that Severus got his encounter with the blonde-haired boy, who he had now concluded, pushed her to the edge. Snape glared him down from behind his desk, carefully scrutinizing his every move in hopes to find one reason to hold him after class.

Draco had yet to notice the fire being thrown his way however, and he laughed and jeered at the other students with his band of cronies. "Mr. Malfoy," Snape snarled, figuring it didn't matter what he was keeping him for, there would be no questions. "You are to stay after class today during your lunch hour to complete that potion's test in which you thought you were to good to do."

"But Professor..." he tried to argue however, Snape lifted his hand to silence him and continued with the 'work' on his desk.

As the class emptied, Draco sat silently at his table glaring the scary professor down. "Mr. Malfoy you will be doing a different potion than the rest of the class. Your potion is on page 293. You have one hour."

He watched the rat boy work busily alone and drummed his fingers on the desk. Draco didn't seem nearly bothered, however he didn't know the truth about Hermione. It is doubtful he would feel any remorse anyways. Draco was too much like his father. Too cold and too careless for his own good.

An hour passed, and Snape had organized the entirety of his papers when the boy approached his desk. "I'm finished sir, can I leave?"

Severus blinked at him, his eyes narrow. "Yes, you may, but before you do, let me say, you should not make a habit of attacking girls in the hallway."

"Excuse me?" The boy was clearly offended by the comment, and a little bit of satisfaction filled Snape.

"Attacking girls. Don't make a habit of it. In fact, you go anywhere near Miss Granger again, and I will see fit that you pay for your actions."

"How dare you accuse me of handling a disgusting mudblood!" Draco snarled in the professors face.

If he wasn't so young, Severus would curse him right there. "Shut it, you pathetic excuse for a boy. I'm not stupid. Keep your father's death eater habits out of this school alright?"

Draco huffed and turned exiting the classroom in silence. If Snape wasn't so angry, he would have been amused at the childish display that the pure blood put on. However, Severus wasn't content. Something inside him was bothered. He looked at the clock, then back down to the book on his desk. He would go see Hermione tomorrow, he told himself, just to see if she's alright.

The next day Snape sat at the desk in his classroom, rubbing his temples with his long index finger. He was so tired. He couldn't sleep the entirety of the night, and spent most of it correcting essays as a distraction. Sometimes he wondered why in the world he was a professor, and other days he couldn't imagine being anything else. He liked his life, for the most part.

As students started to slowly file into the room like assembling cattle, Snape drummed his fingers on his desk in a bored manner. He watched each person enter, ticking their name off on a mandatory attendance sheet. He was always amused at this activity, as you would think that a school of magic could fix a problem such as attendance sheets.

However, the drumming soon stopped as Severus noticed a surprising addition to his class. He watched her as she moved to her seat in the back, and sat down. No eye contact. Her long brown hair covered her face, but from the little that was visible, he could see strain. She looked up slightly and glared angrily in his direction. The hatred in her eyes for him panged his stomach and he was forced to look away. _Severus, what's wrong with you? _

He assigned the class a simple essay on magical professions commonly dealing with bezoars, and set himself to work on a potion of his own. It would pose as a distraction for him. As he was almost carelessly cutting up a bat's wing, he kept looking awkwardly in her direction. Her body language bugged him, and he knew that he needed to talk to her. Besides, Dumbledore said he should didn't he?

Severus' potion was complete as the class came to an end, and he addressed the class before they left. "The essays are due tomorrow, no exceptions," he said warningly.

The class emptied completely, leaving one student sitting alone in the back still writing. He watched her intently as she shuffled her papers, looked them over, shrugged to herself and got up heading towards the front desk.

The brown haired witch placed the parchment on his desk and, without a glance at the professor, she turned to walk away.

"Miss Granger," Severus said plainly, trying to catch her attention. He had things to say; she couldn't leave yet. She looked back at him. Her eyes were stone cold, and blank, much like the way Severus always held his. They stared at him with hatred and hurt and tragedy. It was enough to break anyone's heart. "Hermione," he continued softly, a trait abnormal for the man. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," she shrugged back.

She was so careless, he raged. It was as if this didn't happen at all to her. He tried to hold his opinions back, but he was so angry. "That was incredibly foolish and childish of you Miss Granger. You could've died."

She chuckled slightly to herself and replied, "That was the plan professor."

Snape stopped for a moment. He was taken back by this new demeanor she had. It worried him, as it was too much like his own. "Hermione, your the brightest witch in your age. Why in the world would you attempt something so stupid?"

"Because I had to," she looked down trying to fight back the tears in her eyes. Severus could see she was trying to be strong.

He argued with himself in his mind. On one side he wanted to comfort the girl, and on the other side he wanted to kill her himself. It was like watching a wounded animal on the side of the road. You want to help it, but mostly just put it out of it's misery. "Hermione, talk to me."

"Why the fuck do you care anyways?" She exploded on him suddenly in a fit of tears and rage. "Since when have you cared about anybody? Your always pushing people around, making them feel like shit. Well you know what? This is what you fucking get."

Severus was silent. He knew she was right, but he never intended to push anyone that far, despite what people thought.

"Besides," she continued on. "It was your people who did this to my family. Your little death eater friends. If anything I should be trying to kill you! You could have been one of the ones who killed them!"

Now he was pissed. How dare she accuse him of such a thing. He'll give her credit to have reason to think something like that, but why in the world would he murder her parents. He was on their side! He stood up and walked around his desk approaching her. "You think I killed your parents? Do you really think that I would be standing here if I was one of the ones who did?"

She stood her ground and glared up at him. He wasn't that much taller than her, over the years she had grown in height. "How am I supposed to know? It's not like you haven't murdered before. It's almost a hobby for you people, isn't it?"

Her tone was really getting under his skin, but if anything he was trying to get close to her. In her weakened state, he wanted to just pull her in and wrap his arms around her. However, he was now standing an inch away from her, his eyes narrow. "No, it isn't Miss Granger. And I would advise you didn't talk of things you don't know."

They stared at each other in silence. Tears were falling down Hermione's face. She looked so angry, but more tired than anything. Severus knew this look well. Defeat. Hermione looked down, breaking eye contact, but he cupped her chin and lifted it back up so that her eyes met his. He raised his hand and brushed a tear off her cheek.

She reminded Severus so much of Lily back when they were young. A moment almost exactly like this, right after her and James first fight. She came to him of all people and he comforted her. A sick feeling entered his heart.

"Trust me Hermione, life gets better," he scanned her eyes for understanding, but he couldn't make anything out through the tears. He pulled her in and wrapped his arms around her in a warm hug. She just needed somebody there for her, to understand, and he knew that. "I promise."


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note:Oh man, long time no write? Shitty I know and I apologize, writers block and Law Class does that to one. So here is goes; Hermione+Snape = Romance? Or Friendship? YOU DECIDE. Leave a comment, tell me what you think and which direction you think this should go?

As the hard wood door of the potions classroom closed behind her, Hermione leaned her head on the cold stone walls. She drew in a deep breath and exhaled it slowly, trying to collect her thoughts. Did that really just happen? Did Severus Snape really just comfort her? She didn't understand at all the last few minutes and she was completely baffled.

One moment he was nearly threatening her with his tone, and the next she was crying in his arms as he hugged her. Just hugged her. She admitted to herself it was nice to have someone there for her, and to be able to unload all of her problems, but she never expected it would have been on one of the men she hated most. Well, she didn't really hate him...

She began to make her way towards her next class, despite not wanting to at all, she listened to her echoing footsteps. The halls were empty and she was late. She hoped Professor McGonagal wouldn't be too angry with her. However, a part of her really didn't care.

"Oh Miss Granger," a man voice called joyously and she spun around quick to see the Gryffindor ghost approaching her. "Glad I found you. I do hope your feeling better. I was sent to inform you that Professor Dumbledore would like to see you in his office. Shall I escort you?"

"Oh, er... sure," she gave a fake smile and followed the ghost towards the headmaster's office. The walk was long and Hermione was forced to hear Nearly-Headless Nick's rants on the recent argument with Sir Patrick Podmore.

"Honestly," he grieved. "It's not that far off. Why must I be nearly headless? Couldn't finish the job could they? Had to stop for their lunch break? It's all because of that unqualified executioner that Podmore feels it neccessary to ban me from the Headless Hunt."

Eventually Hermione numbed out the sound, and focused on the voice in her head. _Did you need to yell at him? He was the one who pushed you to the edge in the first place. Yeah, but you know it wasn't his fault. He did seem to care. No, he doesn't care about anybody. But maybe i'm different..._

"So I guess i'll leave you here. No reason for a ghost to use stairs, right?"

Nick's voice stirred her, "Oh, yeah, thanks. Pumpkin Pasties." She watch the stair case form from the statues and walked up, pushing open the large door, and entering the vast room.

The headmaster was standing in the back of the room, talking to a painting he had on the wall. They were in an animated conversation, so Hermione cleared her voice roughly to let the professor know she was there. "Ah, Hermione!" He glided over, nodding at the painting, as he returned the gesture. "I was just speaking to Newton Scamander about the proper breeding of Hippogriffs. His mother bred them you know, and recently Hagrid has decided to attempt to train them as he had the Thestrals."

She nodded at this, clearly uninterested in Hagrid's latest plot for amusement. Hermione hated being so cynical, but she liked to think she had a right to. Besides, everybody seemed to have this positive outlook on the wizarding world, she felt it couldn't harm to have just one angry teen.

"How are you feeling today Miss Granger?" The old man smiled and she felt obliged to smile back.

"Better than yesterday, worse than tomorrow," she responded enjoying the use of such a vague term. When Albus raised an eyebrow at her, she sighed, " I could be worse... I could be dead."

"That's very true. It's a good thing Severus was there so catch you."

"Yeah, I guess," she couldn't decide whether to truly agree with this statement.

"He can help you Hermione. He has been where you are," the man's blue eyes gazed at her over his half-moon spectacles. She always liked those glasses, they gave her professor a father-like feel. Someone you could talk to. Of course, not about what she was going through. Now she understood why Harry like him so much.

"He spoke to me this morning about it."

"Oh, he did? Splendid!" Albus clapped his hands together. "I want you to start spending a little time with him, as a mentor. Once a week or so should do. Just so you begin to get those boggarts out of the closet of your mind."

Hermione considered what he was saying for a moment. She had yet to understand how he could help her in anyway, but it was true, he might be able to help her. If only the headmaster wanted her to talk with somebody a little more... charming. However, her potions master did seem to care, at least a little. She looked up at Albus and nodded slightly. She couldn't believe she was agreeing to this.

"Perfect! Now, lunch is going to begin in the great hall. We wouldn't want to be late!" Dumbledore stood up and pushed her towards the door.

Hermione walked towards the hall silent, and alone. Her thoughts relayed to that morning and the yelling between her and Severus. She had never snapped in such a way, at a teacher before. It felt good to get a little of the tension off her. Maybe it would do her some good to talk. There was a lot she was confused about, and a lot she was feeling that nobody understood. But maybe he could. Besides, what had the headmaster meant by 'he had been where you are'?

As she walked, Hermione realized she felt a lot better than she had when she awoke. In fact, she felt a lot better than she had in a very long time. She smiled to herself as she entered the hall. It was busy as usual, and she walked down the gryffindor table, to find her friends sitting all together with a spot saved just for her. Hermione's heart warmed a little bit, realizing that they had been thinking about her all this time. Maybe she wasn't so alone.

She sat beside Ron who was gobbling down sandwich squares by the dozen and rambling on about Gryffindor's latest quidditch game against Slytherin, the one they had so gracefully lost. Meanwhile, on the other side of the table Harry sat pouting.

"And then, Malfoy flew up beside him right, and pushed Harry aside. Completely slammed him, and caught the snitch right there in front of his nose!"

Harry glared him down and grumbled, "Shut it Ron, I'm sick of your dreadful speckled mug."

Ron smirked back at him, "Why must you hurt me in this way Harry?"

"Having a little Wizard Angst Harry?" Hermione asked him, biting into her sandwich square and decidedly filling her plate with more. She was suddenly terribly hungry.

The three Gryffindor's looked at her strangely as she started giggling to herself about the term Wizard angst. "Hi Hermione," Ginny started slowly. "How are you feeling today?"

"Not bad. How about you guys?" She replied looking up to see her friends smiling broadly.

"Were great, now," Harry replied and dug at the food on the plate in front of him. And for the first time in what felt like forever, Hermione talked to her friends and ate more sandwiches than what was healthy.

She looked up at the head table to see her potions professor staring at her, and she looked at him for a moment before blushing and turning away. _Why are you blushing. God, your such a girl._

"Hey Hermione?" Her ginger friend beside her, tore her from the thoughts in her head.

"Hm?" She replied turning towards him.

"I'm glad your back," he hugged her, and as his arms wrapped around her, she looked up to see her professor still staring at her, now with an undecipherable expression on his face.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Okay, just in case anyone either did or not pick up the Wizard Angst referance, i forgot to disclaim it. It isn't mine, its from a Potter Puppet Pals video called _drumroll please _ "Wizard Angst" Its a favourite of mine and my friends so i thought i would encorporate it. ANYWAYS really hope you enjoy the chapter and PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review :D

Later that night, Hermione found herself alone in her bedroom staring out her usual window, basking in the cool night air. She was tired, and she wanted to sleep but couldn't. The only difference this time, was that it wasn't fear of sleep that was keeping her awake. For the first time in months, her dream wasn't on her mind. Now, it was the event she had witnessed in the great hall during lunch that posed a bother in her mind.

She didn't understand the look she saw on Snape's face, or the expression in his eyes when Ron hugged her. Moments later he stood up and left as if he was in a rage. She recalled a very audible scratch of his chair on the wood floor and many curious glances from the surrounding teachers, and she wondered if he noticed her curious glance as well. The rest of the day she hoped it wasn't her who had angered him earlier in the morning. She heard from Ginny that he was, in her words , 'a ritious git' during the afternoon potions class, and inside she blamed herself for yelling at him to harshly earlier.

Hermione thought to herself that she ought to go see him that night. She didn't want him to be angry with her, however it was late and he would probably be more cross if she went now._ Why do you care so much about what he thinks?_

She sighed and closed the large window. The night was overtaking her and the coma of sleep was making her mind numb. She couldn't think properly and Hermione figured that was why she was thinking these things. _You'll wake up tomorrow fine, and none of today will even matter. He will still be the same old cynical teacher. Besides, Dumbledore probably told him to help you, as he told you to seek his help. So your not that special Hermione._

However, before she drifted quickly into a deep fitful sleep, she resolved to talk to him the next day. If not about his problems, she would talk about hers.

Hermione opened her eyes. She was lying in a large field scattered with tall shading trees. She must have dozed off while reading for the sky was filled with red and blue hues of the sunset. She looked at her watch, a proud muggle possession, and it read 7 o'clock. She missed dinner and her stomach growled hungrily wondering what her mother had made. Hermione stood up, catching the book on her lap as it tumbled towards the ground. A breeze blew through the park, rustling the trees and sending a chill up her spine. It felt as if somebody was watching her, and she twisted around quickly to catch a glimpse but she was completely alone except for a few kids playing on the other side of the land.

Straightening her skirt she began to walk home. She had dreams like this many times before and never once was she wearing a skirt, nor a sweater. The book she carried was a potions book, which she normally would never bring into the muggle world. Something was different. Puzzled, she headed towards her home, knowing what was ahead. She turned the corner on her street and instantly felt something out of place. She approached the white fence bordering her property and looked around anxiously. Nothing from the outside of the two storey home seem unordinary. The bushed were in place, the curtains on the windows were not moved, and everything sat as normally as it should. It wasn't until she approached the door, noticing it was slightly ajar, did she fully realize what was happening.

She took a deep breath and open the door. Her heart beat fast, and her teeth clenched. Furniature was knocked over and materials were strewn all over the floor. She took a step in and heard a crunch, looking down to see a photo frame of herself and her family broken on the ground at her feet. "Mom? Dad?" She called, shaking as she took a few steps further. The sofa in the living room was torn and flipped, and on the other side Hermione's parents lay motionless on the carpet.

She ceased to scream, and froze solid, motionless in fear and shock. The fear stricken eyes of her father stared at her lifeless from his corpse. He was bleeding slightly as a small dribble of blood fell down his forehead. He put up a fight, most likely to save her mother. Her mother's clothes were torn slightly and upon this sight Hermione's cried silent tears.

She turned fast to run from the place, but someone was standing behind her. He wrapped his arms around her tight, and instinctively she began to fight, but he held her closer and whispered in her ear in a deep soothing voice, "It's okay, it's just me." Hermione dissolved in a pile of tears, with his arms wrapped around her tight she cried into his robes. "I'll protect you," he drawled into her ear. "Your safe with me."

She continued to sob in his arms as a pressure surrounded her and they apparated from the house into a large apartment. The walls were painted red, the furniture was black, and it was tastefully decorated with classical paintings. However, all of this went unnoticed through her tears and he sat on the couch sitting her down beside him. He grabbed her face and pulled it towards his. Hermione looked into his dark eyes filled with a concern she had never noticed before and he pulled her into a deep ki...

Hermione sat up fast in her bed breathing heavily in a selfish gasp for air. She felt around her bed for a grasp of solidity and brushed her hand through her hair. Beads of sweat clung to her face and body and she groaned back into her pillow. _What is wrong with you... _She lied back in her bed but couldn't sleep and resolved to just reading in the common room.

She made her way down the stairs with her transfiguration book in hand to notice Ron sitting on the couch playing a game of wizard's chess against himself. "Hey Ronald," she sat down beside him smiling. "Who's winning?"

"Oh hey Herms. Why are you up so late?" He asked, smiling back but still focusing on his game.

"I couldn't sleep, but that's not new," she laughed and opened her book skimming it lightly.

"Me neither," he replied and silence followed, both students simply enjoying the other's company.

Hours went by and soon dawn broke through the common room windows, Hermione awoke from a dreamless sleep to find herself still sitting on the couch. She shifted slightly, noticing a weight on her lap and looked down to see a fluff of red hair lying in her lap. She smiled and placed a hand on his head, not to wake him up, just to check that it was really him and he wasn't a dream.

He moved at her touched, and lifted his head. "I... mm..." he stuttered and then sat up quickly. "Oh.." Ron looked at Hermione and then at her lap and blushed a red deeper than his hair colour. "Good morning," he tried to cover cooly and smirked but it was too late, dignity was out the ceiling high windows. "I'm sorry..." he blushed deeper.

"It's alright," she laughed back. "Don't be sorry. I'm gonna go get changed. I'll see you at breakfast." Hermione picked up her book and headed towards the store. She could feels his eyes watching her as she left.

Once in her room, she started the shower and got undressed, looking at herself in the mirror. _Your way too skinny Hermione. You need to start eating. Maybe Severus would have a potion to gain a little weight. Severus? Since when do you call him that._

She chastised herself as she stepped into the shower, however, she resolved to visit her potions professor after breakfast. If he didn't have a potion, at least she could talk a bit. _Not about your dream._

"No," she said allowed with a giggle. "Not about my dream."


	6. Chapter 6

Hermione stayed in front of the large doors leading into the potions classroom for several minutes. Professor Snape wasn't at breakfast that morning and Hermione was worried that something was wrong. She didn't know what was wrong, but she was worried that it may involve her. She paced back and forth in front of the entrance, her mind was whirling in nervousness and unsurity.

_He won't mind you going in there to see him. Just knock. He doesn't have a class to teach. Besides, if he asks, just say the headmaster told you to go. _

She took a deep breath and continued to pace back and forth. Her mind reeled back to her dreams. The way he held her, the way he touched her, and the way he...

_Oh stop it. It was just a dream..._

Hermione was about to reach for the door's handle when it swung open. "Yes?" Her professor glowered down at her from the doorway. His hair was slightly disheveled, looking as if he fell asleep on his desk and she couldn't help but think he looked cute.

"I... er..." she stuttered. Hermione really wasn't sure how to say the next words without it just sounding awkward. She really hadn't planned that part, and cursed at herself for it. "I came to talk."

He groaned slightly and opened his door further giving her room to walk in. "Follow me," he mumbled and waved his wand at a blank spot on the wall. Hermione watched as the green outline of a door appeared and Severus grabbed a hold of her hand pulling her through the magical doorway.

The room was large and cozy. Hermione was amazed looking around at what she guessed was Snape's personal quarters. The main room was dimly lit from the fireplace but tastefully decorated. A beautiful rug lay on the floor with two large high-back chairs sitting on top and a small table in between. The walls were lined with ceiling high bookshelves made of a dark wood, and each bookshelf was filled completely with text. There were also two alternative doorways, one heading to a small kitchen and another to what Hermione assumed was his bedroom.

"You can wait here," he pointed at one of the chairs in front of the fireplace, and walked into his bedroom in a bit of a huff. Hermione instantly obeyed, sitting in the comfy seat and patiently waited. "What did you need to talk about?" She heard his voice call from the other room.

"Oh," she never really considered the answer to that question. She had no idea what she was going to say. "Just about the past couple of months. They've been hard I guess. You seemed a little upset last night," she attempted to change the subject, trying to be clever but failing badly.

"What?"

"Last night in the great hall. You looked like something was wrong," she tried again still failing.

Severus walked out of his room in slimming black pants and a white button up that was only buttoned halfway up his stomach revealing his pale and surprisingly built chest. Hermione was shocked to see that her professor had such a built figure. She didn't know what she expected was under all of the robes he normally wore, but it wasn't that. He gave her a strange look as he passed by her and entered the kitchen. "About the last few months," he avoided her questions and Hermione felt a little dissapointed. "How have you been coping?"

"Well, in light of recent events, I guess you should already know," she laughed slightly. When silence followed, she continued, "Okay well it hasn't been great. I don't eat, I don't sleep, it's all I can think about and I keep blaming myself."

Severus exited the kitchen with a steaming cup of something in his hand. Hermione didn't know what it was, but it smelled good. He sat down in the chair beside her and peered at her over his cup. "I have noticed you've gotten rather... tinier, and your performance is..." he chose his words carefully. "Not up to par."

Hermione took a little pride in the idea that he noticed how she looked, even if it wasn't really a compliment. "I know. I was going to ask you if you had a potion that could help me gain a little weight."

"A comment never expected from a teenage girl," he laughed to himself. It was a nice clean laugh, an honest laugh. Something Hermione never heard before. She was so used to his sarcasm and obnoxious nature she thought that was all he was capable of. However, she began to realize that her professor was so much more than the bat-like creature everybody pinned him for. Especially in that shirt..

_SHUT UP HERMIONE. FOCUS.. he's talking.. what is he saying..._

"I do have one, but that really isn't the solution. You need to eat. I noticed last night that you were eating quite a bit.. along with that.. Weasley boy," he broke off in an awkward silence.

"Yeah..." she was unsure what to say. "I was feeling better last night a little, and I was really hungry for the first time in a long time. My dreams changed so I was surprised, I think I may be improving a little."

"Dreams? Of the... of your summer?"

"It's always the same dream of me waking up in a park, then going to my home and witnessing it all again. It's just what happened relaying in my head night after night," she tried not to let any tears begin to form, and concentrated intently on the bookshelf.

"And you said they changed?"

_Shit.. I did? _"Not a lot. Just insignificant things within the same dream. I'll be wearing different clothes, or the book I was carrying would be different, or someone new would come into the dream. Does it mean I'm starting to forget?"

Severus sat still for a moment and just stared at her, as if he knew there was something she was leaving out. "It could mean that, or it could be that something else is on your mind."

Hermione blushed slightly at her thoughts and turned away. "Perhaps I should leave, lunch is soon and my friends will be expecting me."

Severus nodded as she got up. "The ward is one way, so you should be able to go without my help."

"Thank you sir," Hermione smiled and hurried out with her thoughts, leaving Snape with his own.

_GAHH Your Such A Fool! ... mentioning the changes, whats wrong with you! He could have clued in. On second thought.._

"Let him know, I dont care!" Hermione almost shouted as she exited the dungeons.

"Let who know what Granger?"

Hermione groaned out loud. Malfoy always had to show up and ruin a half decent moment. "What do you want Draco?"

"Oh nothing..." He strode along side her, keeping up as she tried to walk faster. "So, I heard you told Professor Snape about our little Rendez Vous. He wasn't very pleased with me."

Hermione mentally froze and tried to speed up her pace. She didn't know what to say or who had told him, but an angry Malfoy was never good.

"What I want to know, is why would a Slytherin Professor, care so much about a Gryffindor girl?" Malfoy stepped in front of her and she slammed into him.

"God damnit, Malfoy. Maybe he is actually a caring person!" She glared up at him. "Now, move."

"Snape a caring person? Have you been smoking Gilly Weed Granger?" He laughed in her face. Malfoy leaned in close by her ear and whispered, "I know what you did Granger. I know what happened on the tower." Hermione drew in a sharp breath. "And if you piss me off any more, i'll tell the entire school about you, the professor and that night." He stepped back and looked into her face smugly.

She was in shock and there was no way to hide it. How the hell did he know? Her face grew pale, and she looked at him with eyes wide.

"Well you have a good day, and we'll be in touch," Malfoy patted her shoulder roughly and stalked away laughing to himself.

Hermione stood motionless. She couldn't think, speak or even move. Malfoy had the world against her, and there was nothing she could do.

She went back up to the Gryffindor tower and layed in her bed. She closed her eyes and willed herself to sleep, hoping to wake up and realize all of this was just a bad dream.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: **Heyyy so it's been a while since update, I knowwwwww. Sorry. School and stuff. Anyways, PLEASE REVIEW. I can't explain how happy I am when I open my e-mail inbox and it says there are reviews. If you've read it up to this chapter you HAVE to have something to say. :) Plus the more reviews, the faster im inclined to update.**

Hermione stared tentatively at her paper trying to think of words to write, but nothing coming to mind. She breathed slowly, pacing her breaths to the ticking of the clock, waiting for class to be over. She didn't want to hand in a blank paper, but there was already so much on her mind that to focus on something as simple as turning a couch into a fully functioning wardrobe seemed pointless.

Didn't anybody know that there were more important things in the world that rearranging furniture? That real people had real problems?

"Regardless of whether you are finished or not, a paper with your name must be handed in," the tall professor instructed looking at Hermione with a furrowed brow. Normally Hermione would have noticed a worried expression as such but her eyes were trained on the empty parchment and the quill.

After a few more minutes the older witch announced the end of the class and Hermione obediently walked forward presenting her empty parchment, save for her name, and walked out next to Ron and Harry.

"Man, that was brutal," the red-head stretched his hand as if to relieve a cramp. "I had no idea what do draw for the diagram."

Harry wiped his glasses as he walked and laughed. "Honestly, I think my picture looked like an angry Snape being eaten by sofa cushions." Both boys laughed and Hermione smiled automatically. "How did you do Hermione?"

"Don't even bother asking her Harry, she always gets near to perfect."

"Actually I..." Hermione began to interject but stopped suddenly at the sight of a blonde haired boy. He just passed her with a smirk and her stomach turned. "I... I finished early, so I'm not sure how I did."

"I'm sure you aced it as always," Ron posed and then began to blabber on senselessly about the weekend quidditch game.

Since the encounter with Malfoy a few weeks back Hermione saw him everywhere. She figured she was even imagining it sometimes, but he was definitely around. Malfoy had yet to talk to her, and she had never mentioned that evening to Severus. She made a note to go visit her professor tonight.

Hermione visited Snape often just to talk, or to read. He had grown somewhat accustomed to her, or so she liked to think. Then again, she figured Dumbledore may just be forcing him to amuse her. For that, she was grateful.

Silently she followed her two friends to the great hall for lunch and took her normal place next to Ron, ensuring her back was towards the Slytherin table.

"There's a Hogsmeade trip tomorrow, are you guys going?" Hermione asked, reaching for a sandwich and taking a bite.

"I was thinking of it, but we have a huge quidditch match against Slytherin on Sunday, and we _need_ to win this game," Harry glared accusingly in Ron's direction.

"Come on Harry. We never go to Hogsmeade and I really need to get out of this castle," Hermione attempted the use of the whiney girl's voice as a way to sway his opinion.

"I guess, as long as Ron ups his game. You know Ron... you can't keep staring at girls..." Harry began to chastise, and Hermione slowly drifted from the conversation. She was happy she could still convince Harry to do anything, and she was happy that they were all going. She really didn't want to have to go to Hogsmeade alone.

As she chewed on her second sandwich, Hermione looked up towards the head table. She scanned the table for anything out of the ordinary, and her eyes connected with the dark-haired professor's. She smiled slightly, enough for him to notice at least, and he nodded back. She looked away smiling even more, a tiny twinge-feeling entering her stomach.

"Who are you smiling at?" Ron said through his stuffed mouth, and threw his arm over her shoulder. "What boy gets your special attention?" Hermione could almost hear urgency in his voice as he looked around. "Oh man, Snape looks angry today. Hope he cheers up a bit for potions class. Last thing I need is the angry bat losing it on everybody again."

"Do you not think that maybe he is so mad because everyone calls him an 'angry old bat'?"

The two boys looked at Hermione in slight shock, surprised at her outburst. "I didn't know you were team Snape all of a sudden."

"Im not.. er," Hermione didn't know what to say and found that the thing to do was excuse herself. She ran quickly from the great hall and towards the dungeon. It was fifteen minutes until potions class anyways, she figured she would get in a few minutes of studying.

As she walked, she could hear footsteps behind her following at the same slow pace she was. She glanced back slightly to see a blonde haired boy following her and closed her eyes as she continued down the hall.

"Granger," he called her name and she continued to walk. "Granger, slow down." He ran up beside her and began to walk in step.

"Yes Malfoy?" She sounded as if he was cursing her.

"Just wanted to say hi," he stated simply as they walked. Hermione furrowed her brow, confused. "So, where are you going?" He asked.

"To potions class, to study."

"Hoping to get to talk with the Professor?"

She couldn't lie to herself, it was a thought that crossed her mind. However, Malfoy had potions with her too and it looked like he had his books with him. "No actually, if you can't remember, we have a potions test today." Hermione opened the door to the classroom and took her seat in the back. Malfoy sat in the seat next to hers. "What are you doing?" She glared over.

"I feel like sitting here today, and for you to do my test," he smirked.

"I'm not doing anything for you."

"Oh really?" He squinted his eyes slightly, giving a look as if he was going to punch her. "Do you not remember our little arrangement?" Hermione just stared at the table in front of her. "Well, do you?"

"Yes," she whispered.

"Well then, what were you saying about my test?"

Just then the potions master walked into the room and to his desk. He was grumbling to himself and seemed not to notice the two students. "Stupid kids and their stupid issues..." He paused right before his desk and whirled around. "What are you doing in my classroom?"

"Hermione here was just helping me study sir," Draco said nonchalantly.

Snape knew Draco was lying, and looked over to Hermione. She was avoiding eye contact, staring at the table in front of her. The expression was defeated, with fear and even anger. For a second he worried she was mad at him, but he brushed that off fast.

_Don't play a childs game, Severus._

"I'm sure a wizard of your status is fully capable to study on your own. Return to your table Draco." He watched as the young wizard angrily moved his books, and as the young witches posture relaxed slightly, yet she still refused to look at him.

Soon the rest of the class began to file in, the potions master informed them of their task and sat down behind his desk. As he was grading the papers of the morning class, he eyes kept drifting towards the brown headed girl. He watched her effortlessly cut ingredients and place them in her cauldron while the rest of the class struggled.

"I'm finished Professor," she said, half an hour later, handing him the vial. She watched as he uncorked it.

"Smells like cherry."

"As it should," she replied hiding a clear sense of pride.

"I would like to have a word with you after class."

"Of course Professor," she nodded and walked back to her desk.

Twenty minutes later Snape announced the end of the test and each student reluctantly filled a vial, handed it in and filed out of the classroom leaving Hermione sitting alone at her desk in the back. Out of the corner of her eye she watched Draco linger a moment before leaving as well. It was only after he was gone that she got up and walked to the front of the dungeon room.

"Hello Professor," she smiled when he looked up.

"Hermione, take a seat," he conjured a chair in front of his desk, and she obliged. "How are things going?"

"The usual I guess," she shrugged. "Same dreams, same classes, same friends. Nothing has changed really."

Severus raised an eyebrow at her. "And Draco?"

"Being the same old Draco Malfoy," she shrugged once again. Hermione opted to leave her 'arrangement', as he called it, out. She knew he didn't believe her, but it wouldn't be the first thing she left out of conversations.

Severus watched her carefully. He knew she wasn't going to tell him the truth, and if he confronted Draco he knew that the ferret would assume she had talked to him. He needed to make her talk. "I would like you to have dinner with me tonight in my quarters."

Hermione's heart stopped for a moment. She didn't know if she had heard right or if she was just making up scenerios in her head again. "Dinner with you?"

"Yes, at 5:30 this evening."

"Of course... I mean... Yeah, sure," she stuttered.

"You best be on your way Miss Granger. Don't want to be late for your next class," he smirked amused at her childish display and watched at she excused herself, leaving the classroom. Severus wasn't sure what he was doing inviting her for dinner. He thought she may get the wrong impression, however he wasn't sure about what impression he was trying to make.

_Careful Severus, don't play a child's game._

He shook his head slightly and cleared his thoughts as his next class swarmed in, filling the room with the dreadful buzz of students talking that he hated so much.


	8. Chapter 8

**So this was the hardest chapter I have ever had to write. I didn't know how it should go and my characters kept changing on me and they kept doing things I didn't want them to do.. but i guess that's the problem when working with another persons characters.. they have personalities of their own. Anyways, I apologize for Severus being slightly out of character.. I needed to show everyone the side of him that I see.. As usual PLEASE R&R**

* * *

Hermione paced the bedroom back and forth in front of her large wardrobe. She found that sometimes she fretted over the most stupid things. These included tests, essays, and what to wear on a date with your teacher. A date... a date... no it's not a date.

_Why would he make a date with you Hermione, he is just having dinner. That's all. Ordering from the kitchens to eat on a couch and chat. Your being silly. _

She swung the wardrobe doors open and stared blankly at her clothes in front of her. What do you wear on a night like this? A nothing night, an everything night. With a man like him. What does he like?

_It shouldn't matter what he likes. Your a child, and he's well... over thirty. Just throw anything on because it. Is not. A date. _

Hermione sighed to herself and pulled out a regular outfit. She figured casual sexy would be the best way to go. If Severus thought she was a child, she had to fix that. One pair of jeans and a low cut top later, Hermione found herself staring at her tangled mess of hair. She sighed once again.

The clock on her night table struck five and she grabbed her wand ready to face the night. The Gryffindor common room was packed with student getting ready to go to dinner and despite her attempt at making a sneaky escape, Ron spotted her and ran over.

"Hey Herms, you going to dinner tonight?" Her friend smiled in an inviting manner, and Hermione hated having to lie to him.

"No, I have to study and work on a paper. Besides, I had a big lunch so I'm not very hungry," she tried to smile innocently back.

"Oh," Ron's eyes scanned hers as if he was looking for something but she wasn't quite sure what. "Well, I'll see you later then I guess."

Hermione watched as he walked away. She'd noticed the boy was giving her particular attention lately and she didn't want to try and decipher his motives. However, she was reminded of what Ron had said about Snape earlier in the day. About how he looked angry when Ron put his arm over her shoulder, although that bit wasn't apparent to Ron.

_Strange he would get angry over something like that... oh there you go again Hermione, thinking everyone's emotions and feelings revolve around you. Just shut it already and leave, Severus hates when people are late._

She briskly making her way towards the dungeons and within a few minutes she found herself staring at the wooden door leading into her potions class. Hermione hesitated knocking. She wasn't sure whether she misunderstood his invitation or if he was playing some sort of cruel joke. While a part of her ensured that he wouldn't do such a thing, another part reminded her of the lack of empathy a man like Severus Snape could have.

She knocked on the door and stood silent in wait. After a minute or two without answer, she pushed it open slightly. The classroom was empty but, as she walked in, she noticed the opening to her professor's quarters was clear in the wall. No wards in place, just a doorway. She could hear a low tune of classical music emitting from the room and she followed the sound.

The area she entered almost looked like Snape's quarters only the chairs had disappeared and in front of the fireplace now sat a table. An elegant looking dinner table with a chair at either end. Atop the table was a white coloured cloth and neatly placed utensils. In the centre sat two candles on beautiful silver holders. Hermione gasped slightly at the sight and she felt her stomach flutter.

She looked to her right in time to see her teacher exit what seemed to be the kitchen. He stood tall, his dark hair falling in his face. He wore a white button up, slightly undone, and was wiping his hands on a towel.

"Hello Miss Granger," he nodded to her and she blushed. "If you'd like to have a seat, dinner will just be a moment." He pulled a chair out as she walked towards the table.

"...It's beautiful," Hermione gawked at the whole display as she sat at the table.

"Thank you," he turned quickly, but Hermione was sure she saw him smile.

She took the few available minutes to analyze the situation in front of her. Clearly he put effort into this dinner. Clearly he was trying to impress her.

_Impress you? Why?..._

Her thoughts were interrupted as he entered the room again, this time with two white plates. He set one down in front of her place, then his, and before sitting down he tapped a wine bottle on the table and watched as it poured. Hermione looked down at her plate, covered in what looked like an elegant version of a muggle linguine. As she took a bite she closed her eyes and savoured the taste.

"Did you make this yourself?"

He looked at her amused. "Yes I did. I am a chemist, cooking is not that different."

Hermione laughed and continued to eat. The two ate their dinner in silence, however she was well aware that he seemed to be watching her. And this made her blush again.

* * *

As Severus ate his own meal, he did indeed watch her. He noticed how much she's grown since first year. He remembered the insufferable child with poofy hair that bothered him every time she talked, but now the woman in front of him was near to breathtaking. He chastised himself for thinking so, but he wasn't going to lie. Hermione Granger had become a beautiful young witch, and he knew that was an honest thought. Besides, there was only one other woman he ever remembered thinking the same about.

* * *

The silence at the table was deafening, and Hermione knew someone needed to talk first. "So Professor..."

"I think that calling me Severus in private would be appropriate."

"Er... okay. So Severus... have you always been a talented chef?" Hermione tried for humor but whether or not this would work was a bit of a mystery.

He smiled slightly and pushed food onto his fork. "My mother liked to cook, despite being a witch. I learned from her when I was young, when she had the time."

"Oh..." Hermione was awkwardly speechless. She didn't know what to say to something so personal, but it sounded like he was opening up.

The rest of the dinner was spent on small talk. About school, Snape's recent research or just wizard news. Dessert continued the same. As she finished her fondue, Hermione excused herself to the washroom. She washed her hands and gazed into the mirror.

_Alright, the night is going well. Were talking a lot.. that's good. He's your teacher... remember that... your teacher..._

Hermione brushed back her hair with her hand and exited the bathroom. To her amazement the table was gone and a couch was now sitting in front of the burning fireplace. She looked at her professor who was sitting at one end reading. He looked so peaceful and elegant, a side of him she had never seen.

Hermione sat down on the other side of the couch, a feet or two away. "What are you reading?"

"It's a book of essays on uncommon medical uses of different types of poisons," he closed the book and set it down on the coffee table in front of them. "But I don't need to read it now, I was just passing time."

"Actually, I'd like to hear about it," Hermione prompted for conversation. "What kind of poisons?"

Snape didn't look surprised, he turned towards her and smiled an honest smile. "Well, for example, one essay is about how if you neutralize the acid in the poison of a werewolf's saliva, it can cure many common illnesses."

As time passed the conversation moved from essays they have read, to studies and findings Severus has made. They talked about Hermione's goal, and her future. They discussed what Severus wanted to become versus where he was in life. As the time flew by the conversation grew more personal until neither of them realized what they were saying anymore.

He felt like he had been talking forever but Severus was just glad that after all this time he had someone to talk to, someone he could be honest with. After having gone through his childhood almost up to his teaching years, excluding the talk of death eater business, Severus realized the yawning girl leaning against his side.

"Am I boring you?" He joked and the young witch lifted her head.

Hermione realized herself where she was lying and sat up instantly. "No no, I'm just tired... I didn't sleep last night."

Both sat awkwardly looking at each other. She looked so beautiful in the firelight, her skin glowing and her hair so perfectly placed. Severus' stomache turned slightly. Instantly he stood up and offered her his hand. "It's getting late, I think it's best we call it a night."

Hermione rose feeling disappointment that the night was ending, however looking at the clock she realized they had been talking for three hours. Reluctantly she walked to the door, and he opened it for her.

"I had a wonderful night," she said. "Thank you."

Severus was glad that she seemed impress, though he wasn't sure why and as hell wasn't going to let her know that. "I had a nice evening as well Hermione."

She looked up into his face, and he was staring intently at her. She knew she should leave but something was keeping her in place.

_He wants you to go... you've over stayed your welcome. _

_ That's not true and you know it... look in his eyes. What do his eyes say?_

Hermione gazed into the eyes of a man much older than her. A man of authority, and a man of respect. Her heart raced and she didn't know what compelled her to do so but she touched his cheek. His skin was so cold under her hand, and he just continued to stare. He didn't move, nor even flinch. He just stared with a meaningful look that she couldn't decipher.

_... look in his eyes Hermione what do they say?_

_ What do they want? What do they need?_

She stood on her toes to level herself with his face and leaned in slowly to see if he'd pull away. He remained solid. She hovered a millimeter away from his lips, and then pressed her mouth lightly on to his.

He didn't move, and Hermione stepped back to see his eyes were closed and a look of almost sadness on his face. He opened his eyes with nothing to say.

He didn't kiss back, but he didn't pull away. That was good enough for her.

Hermione smiled slightly, "Goodnight Severus."

* * *

Severus watched as Hermione walked away. He could still feel her lips on his as if they were stinging him. He watched her all the way down the dungeon hall until she climbed the stairs, after which he closed the classroom door and re-entered his quarters.

He thought of their evening and how nice it was to talk. He thought of her falling asleep in his lap. He thought of her skin in the fire light, he thought of the kiss.

He brushed his hand through his black hair and he thought,

_Ah Fuck..._


	9. Chapter 9

**YES? NO? Please review! I love them, and I always feel more inspired to write. Let me know what you think about the characters and their development, and also how you think it should go :) ... not that i'll write it the way you want anyway :P they are writing their own stories now, i have NO control.**

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Hermione woke up the next morning with a bad headache. She attested that she may have drank too much wine the previous night. It was enough to calm her nerves and make her brave... make her brave...

_Oh god... what did I do?_

She remembered walking to the door and getting ready to leave. She remembered her heart fluttering, her stomach spinning, her kissing her potions professor...

_OH GOD Hermione..._

But he didn't pull away...

Hermione threw her days clothes on and headed to the common room. It's Saturday, she told herself, the Hogsmeade trip. Maybe it'll take her mind off...

"Hey Hermione!"

"Ron!" She turned around quickly to find herself face to face with her ginger friend. "Are you going to Hogsmeade today?"

"No, unforutnately... Harry wants us to practice extra for the Quidditch match," he mocked intense sadness.

Hermione was disappointed. She really didn't want to go alone, and it would have been nice to spend some time with her friends. However, on the plus side, she could get all of the shopping she wanted done. The Christmas season was only a few weeks away, she figured she may as well get all of her shopping done early.

"That sucks," she laughed. "I'll bring you back some food okay?"

"Sure!" He smiled and walked away leaving Hermione standing awkwardly alone.

She really didn't want breakfast, nor lunch. In fact, she felt more sick than ever and she was sure it wasn't the wine. She wondered if she should go see her professor. The carriages shuttling the students to Hogmeade didn't leave for another hour, and she just had so much she wanted to say. She was sorry; that was a big one.

Hermione decided she would head back to the dungeons. Maybe she could explain herself, though she had no idea what she would say. She made her way down staircases and along hallways, staring at her feet as she walked.

_Crap, Hermione. Your such a kid. Why would you kiss him?_

_ You know you wanted too... you can't complain... he didn't push you away.._

Suddenly she hit what felt like a brick wall, interrupting her thoughts as she walked. The brick wall caught her as she stumbled and she looked up into the eyes of her professor. He looked tired, and his black hair was messy, but he didn't look angry to see her.

"Sir... I'm sorry," Hermione stood straightening herself but his hands remained on her shoulders. "I... I was just going to see you. Look, I need to apologize for..."

Awkward alarm set in his eyes and he silenced her. "Nothing to apologize for Miss Granger. Now I'm off to see Professor Dumbledore and must not make him wait." He squeezed her shoulders lightly before walking away down the hall.

Hermione stood dumbfounded. _Well that was pointless. But he isn't mad..._

She shook her head and turned to watch him walk away.

* * *

Severus walked away from the young witch as quickly as possible. He hadn't planned what to say to her, he was purely focused on what Dumbledore wanted to discuss with him. Why did he have to walk into her, now he couldn't even concentrate at the impending situation. As he walked he blocked visions of the previous night and knocked on the door of the headmaster's office.

"Severus my boy!" The joyous wizard greeted him, and Severus just nodded. "I've been meaning to speak to you for a little while, how are you doing?"

"I'm quite alright, but i'm in a rush." Severus said plainly. He really didn't feel like nonsense and chit chat. He had places to go, things to do.

Albus stood up and walked the room playing with gadgets and knickknacks that sat around. "I've lost track of Voldemort's movements." Severus knew this was going to turn into a favor. "I need you to find out his next plan."

"I can't push for more information than he is willing to give," Severus felt like rolling his eyes at the old man, for Dumbledore knew how dangerous it was for Snape already.

"I understand that, so no pressure," Dumbledore smiled and his eye twinkled. Instantly Severus knew that Voldemort's movements wasn't what was on the old wizards mind. "It has come to my attention that you and Miss Granger have become particularly close as of recent."

Snape's breath caught in his throat, but he tried to stay calm on the outside. He wondered how much Albus knew, and how much trouble he would get in.

"I think you need to continue spending time with her Severus."

"You do?" Snape blurted.

"Yes, she will be really good for you." Albus began pacing his office and Severus grew suspicious.

"What do you mean, good for me?"

"Well, you know Severus. Miss Granger has a good head on her shoulders and could prove useful in our attempts to thwart a certain evil wizard's plans."

Severus was appalled and he stood up angrily. "That is out of the question. Hasn't she been through enough?"

"Well that is the point my boy! With her experience with tragedy, she will be ready to face the cause head on and with determination!"

"That's preposterous and unacceptable!" Snape stalked to the door and turned to face the man. " I do anything you ask, but I will never bring her into this."

He turned to leave and ripped open the door. "Severus, still spend time with her. You need her, even if you can't see it yourself."

Snape walked away down the hall in a furious rage. How dare the old man tell him to bring her into that kind of world. She's just a child. And how dare he say that Severus needs her. He has been perfectly well off on his own all of these years, why would he need a little girl...

He felt the snake on his arm burn and he groaned even louder. This day was only getting worse, and frustration was swelling. He turned down a deserted hallway and apparated away, thankful that Albus did at least one thing for him, giving him the ability to disapparate on the grounds.

* * *

Hermione walked along the streets of Hogsmeade humming to herself happily. It was a beautiful day out, and probably one of the last before the snow would fall. The list in her hand was extensive including Harry, Ginny, Neville, Luna, Ron, the rest of the Weasleys, and...

Hermione looked up from her list at a ruckuss in front of her. Snape burst out of the Three Broomsticks angrily and knocked over a few older wizards. He marched past her, their eyes connecting in the process. She could tell he was really upset, and her heart felt squished at the thought that it was because of her. She didn't even know he would be in the village today.

She looked back to see him heading towards the shrieking shack and instinctively she followed. However, she didn't notice that another person had seen the display and watched her trailing.

"Severus," she yelled when she knew they weren't within earshot of others. "Severus slow down."

He glared back at her and kept moving, "Hermione, not now."

"Severus wait, I need to talk to you."

The tall man sighed to himself and slowed down. "What is it?"

Hermione stopped and paused for a millisecond. She hadn't planned on him actually stopping, and she wasn't even sure why she followed. She was just concerned... worried for him. "I.. I'm worried about you."

"Well don't be."

_Easy for him to say.. _"Well I am, what happened?"

He turned and continued his way towards the shrieking shack. He cursed the girl for caring, and he cursed himself for wanting to tell her. _Your better on your own Severus._

"Severus please tell me, you need to talk," she grabbed on his arm to turn him.

He twisted around and pushed her against a tree. Pinning her in place, he glared into her eyes. "I _don't_ need to talk, I _don't_ need someone caring about me, and I don't need you." He let go and stalked away.

Hermione breathed deeply but stood still. She watched him and she wanted to run after him but another part of her wanted to just run away. She stared until he disappeared into the shack and even then she couldn't look away.

_He doesn't need you. Your just a kid. He doesn't want you..._

She was frozen in place for some time, and eventually decided that she was cold and would just go back to the castle. Hermione turned to find a blonde boy standing behind her, with the darkest smirk on his face. She felt scared but more numb. The cold and the devestation she felt kept her from panic.

"That was brave Granger, chasing after Snape like that. Or as you say, Severus," Draco smirked. He was clearly happy, having finally caught something. With blackmail like this, he could do anything and he knew it. "On a first name basis now Granger?"

Draco stepped right up to her face and Hermione turned away. She couldn't look at him, the fear began to set in. "Your pathetic Granger, did you know that?" He laughed lightly, "You really think he could love a filthy mudblood like you?"

Hermione fought back tears from running down her cheek. She couldn't cry in front of Malfoy. She would die before she'd show him weakness, but she wanted to rip him apart. "Fuck you Malfoy," she spat.

The boy paused in his laughter and took a step back. He flicked his hair out of his eyes and looked her up and down. Hermione didn't like the expression on his face and wished she had never spoke. Malfoy nodded slowly, "That's not a bad idea." He walked away chuckling to himself and Hermione felt her stomach turn.


	10. Chapter 10

REVIEWSS? HM? No.. im not kidding lol, the next chapter will be HUGEEE .. if yu gimme good reviews

A few weeks went by as fall turned into winter and the snow began to set. It was rather chilly out but Hermione didn't mind. She sat on her window sill looking over the lake.

It had been weeks since Severus had said a word to her. She had never meant to scare him away, she only cared. He didn't talk to her in classes, and made an excuse to go when she tried to speak. At first he was at every meal, but the tension between them even from across the hall was too great. It felt as if nobody was in the room but them, and it was so awkward Severus eventually stopped eating with the school.

Hermione felt terrible that he wouldn't speak to her, and she began to seclude herself again. The nightmares were slowly coming back but this time they would be of him.

As well, she began seeing Malfoy less and less. This scared her the most because she knew he was around somewhere.

Days grew longer, and homework became dull again. Eating seemed pointless and sleeping just as much. It felt like all of her healing was disappearing and she felt empty. Hermione scorned herself for being so pathetic about a man but in a way she felt Snape was all she had left. With her parents gone, and her friends having thier own lives, she felt alone and lost.

The Christmas season grew closer and Hermione dreaded it. Ron had invited her to stay at the Burrow, but she felt that being in a full family house wasn't a great idea so she opted to stay at Hogwarts. Sometimes she swore she was a product of self-inflicted misfortune.

As the classes ended for the season, and students began packing their things to leave, the school slowly emptied until just a handful was left. The great hall became one table, and even most of the teachers had parted, so one morning as Hermione sat for breakfast she found herself between the two people that made her want to just disappear.

On her right sat the potions professor, scowling and hunched over his plate, Hermione knew he purposely created a curtain of his hair between them. She sighed to herself as she poked the food in front of her, not daring to chance a glance at the blonde haired boy to her left.

_These things only happen to you... Merlin Hermione..._

Across from her sat the tall bearded Professor humming merrily to himself in a fashion that made you feel as if he was a misfit in the muggle story of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves. Beside him sat a skinny witch with square glasses, and aside from a few younger students, this awkward group was all that was left in the school.

"Oh Severus, how lovely the Christmas season is," Dumbledore smiled and began to chew on a bit of roasted turkey.

"That it is," grumbled the grown man.

"And Hermione," the old wizard smiled again, lifting another piece of turkey towards his mouth. "How are your studies going?"

"They're doing... fine... professor," Hermione stuttered and squirmed slightly trying to pretend nothing was wrong. On her lap to her left fingers were tracing along her thigh and though she tried to push them off, the sly smirk on Malfoy's face made it clear she would not succeed.

Hermione squirmed more, still attempting to seem normal and the fingers made their way higher on her leg, but in the process she bumped the older man beside her. As she looked up to her right, it seemed Severus had already noticed.

Snape glared through his hair at the girl beside him. He knew that he was being childish but he couldn't help himself. He really didn't know how else to handle the situation, except to make Miss Granger feel as though he wanted nothing to do with her. Severus wasn't going to lie, that was one of the hardest thing he ever had to do.

He felt her squirm slightly beside him and she elbowed him in the ribs making the man grimace and angrily mumble to himself. He looked at her face, watching the girl respond to Dumbledore's question and noticed an over composed looked on her features.

_What the devil.._

Severus looked down to see a hand on her lap belonging to a boy that he was really beginning to hate. Hermione beside him look up and begged with her eyes that he do something, but as Severus opened his mouth he felt the snake on his arm start to burn.

The potions professor sighed and stood, excusing himself politely and dragged the Slytherin boy away with him. Once out of earshot the man reared on the boy, his eyes on fire in anger. "Have I not warned you Mr. Malfoy of the consequences you will face from harassing Ms. Granger?"

Draco seemed to not dare to speak and kept his silence, an action that almost made Severus more suspicious. The boy merely nodded and smirked, and Snape found himself wanting to punch the smirk of the kids face.

Severus turned around and stalked away down the hall, disapparating once he turned the corner. He appeared in the driveway of Malfoy Manor, the tall building loomed over him and grimaced down, unwelcoming even to the most usual guests. He walked up the steps and into the home, through the various hallways and up to a large set of oak doors.

Snape pushed the doors open slowly and walked in, to bow in front of the man he hated most. Since he began his life as a death eater, Severus has this man with all his passion possible and today was no different especially in his given mood. "Sit Severus," the pale man motioned to a chair across from him.

"Thank you my lord," Severus bowed again before taking a seat in the plush chair.

"It has come to my attention Severus, that as of recent, you have been paying particular attention to a Gryffindor student of yours," the snake-like man twisted his fingers and looked intently at Snape. "A female student."

"Pardon me, my lord?"

"The Potter boy's friend. Miss Granger?"

"Ah yes," Severus shrugged, aiming to seem as if this was bland news to him, however he was deeply unsettled. He began to form a cover story.

"I have to say Severus, I don't enjoy knowing my Death Eaters are working on their own 'side missions.'" The man continued to stare but Snape felt that he wasn't angry. "However, I will admit that this plan of yours is a brilliant one."

Slightly confused Severus merely nodded. _What in the world could he think… oh…_

"Yes Severus, it was quite clever. I have just brought you here so you could update me on the status of the situation." The pale man waited and Snape calculated his next move.

"It is taking time for her to trust me, but soon I will have her. Teenage girls are terribly predictable," he wasn't even sure what he was saying anymore. Voldamort looked pleased and waved Snape away, and at the cue for him to leave, Snape stalked off the property and instantly dissaparated to Hogwarts.

The moment his feet touched the ground, the potions professor broke into a slight run. No student was there to see him, and quite frankly he couldn't care either way. He ran until he reached the office of one Professor McGonagal, and practically burst the door down to find a startled witch looking up from a stack of papers. "Severus… what.."

"Minerva, where is Miss Granger?"

Her eyes were wide and fear crept in, "She went to Hogsmeade for the afternoon. Why?"

"What about Mr. Malfoy?"

"I.. I haven't seen him since breakfast, Severus what is going on?"

Snape ignored her question and ran from the room towards the Headmaster's office. He cursed himself for getting her into this, and that once again someone he cared for would get hurt because of him.

As he reached the Gargoyle stairs leading up to Dumbledore's office the snake on his arm burned once more, and all color slipped from his already pale complexion.

_Any night you get a call from the Dark Lord twice… is never a good night._


	11. Chapter 11

A/N – As the school year furthers, and I trap myself in a pile of college work, I make all the time I can to write :P i'll update a.s.a.p for all my chapters, however just sayin... the more reviews i get, the more im inclined to write ;)

* * *

Hermione enjoyed being alone. Unlike most people, she thrived in a solitary environment. One where she could just read, live amongst her books. She found other people were loud and obnoxious, or rude and uncaring. That was just her bitter side though.

So it was slightly surprising that Hermione found herself sitting in the corner of the Three Broomsticks with an Ancient Runes book propped up in front of her. She sipped on a butter beer as she skimmed the pages, mumbling the words to herself for memory. Every few minutes she looked up to find the same old wizard staring at her.

_What a creep.. _she thought to herself.

She had been sitting there for over an hour and he had as well, just staring. Hermione sighed to herself. She was used to men looking at her that way, since she grew out of the frumpy frame she had grown up with. Now she was elegant and thin with a form fitting chest and long legs. It was a common thing for men to stare but this man bugged her and she didn't know why.

She packed up her books and finished her drink, refusing to look at the man as she walked from the pub. The sun was setting, so the sky was a light orange and the air had grown chillier. Hermione pulled her coat tighter around her and began her walk to the Hogwarts castle. The walk was fairly long, however it wasn't as if she had anywhere particular to be.

As she was walking, her bag grew heavy on her shoulders and she stopped for a break. Remembering she had packed snacks in her bag, Hermione dug through the pockets and pulled out an apple. As she stood, she came face to face with none other than Draco Malfoy.

Hermione jumped back startled and screamed, and the boy merely chuckled. "Merlin's Beard! Malfoy, what do you want?" She was never one to enjoy surprises, and this wasn't an enjoyable one anyways.

"Fancy seeing you here Granger," he smirked and she glared.

"Have you been following me?"

"Not, really," he shrugged. "Hey, I was thinking since your parents died and you're alone on Christmas, how about you come to my home for the holidays?"

Hermione suspiciously looked at the boy. She knew he wasn't being serious, at least not sincere, and she wasn't sure of his motives. "I should get back to the school," she lifted her bag on her shoulders and began to walk but Draco grabbed her wrist and pulled her round to face him.

"Oh come on Granger," he smirked. "It'll be fun, I promise." He had a glint in his eye that she really didn't like.

"No, really Malfoy, I have to..." she tried to pull her wrist away but his grip was too strong.

He tightened his hold and grabbed her waist with his other hand, pulling her right up against him. "I wasn't really inviting you anywhere Granger. I was telling you." He smiled maliciously, "it's cute that you think you have choice."

Hermione's world spun, her breath grew short, and she felt the ground move out from under her and back again before she could even realize that she was aparating. Before she knew it, she was standing in front of a tall, dark mansion. "Let go of me!" She pushed Malfoy away from her but he kept hold of her wrist and walked towards the mansion, dragging her behind him. "Malfoy, let go of me!"

"Would you just shut up?" He pulled her through the front doors of the house and down a dark hallway.

"Where are we going?" Hermione was panicking and she started beating his arm with her other fist to break his grasp. "Let me go!'

The boy turned around and backhanded the right side of her face. "I said be quiet!" Hermione halted and fought back tears swelling as her cheek stung furiously.

"That'll be enough Draco," a deep voice spoke and she looked up to see a tall man with long blonde hair. He had equal features to his son and Hermione was no more excited to see him. Draco released her wrist and turn to face his father, a look of frustration upon his face. "That is no way to greet such a pretty girl to our home, son."

"The Dark Lord wants to see her," Draco spoke and his frustration was obvious in his voice. Hermione's heart race and she felt sick. The Dark Lord wanted to see her, she couldn't imagine what for.

"In that case, I will escort her myself," the older man, known as Lucius Malfoy, nodded at his son and Draco walked away. He turned and smiled warmingly at Hermione, though she knew his smile was as nothing but icy. "Miss Granger, if you would care to follow me." He placed his hand on the low of her back and pushed her forward down two more hallways and to a set of big oak doors. Lucius opened the doors and pushed Hermione through, closing them behind him as he followed.

Although Hermione's heart raced so fast, everything seemed to slow down. She never thought she would be here, standing in the centre of a room filled with death eaters. People she had only heard rumors about when she was in the order. She always thought this would be Harry, facing the darkest man in the world. It had never once crossed her mind…

"Miss Hermione Granger," a man stood, from a throne like chair at one end of the room. She continued moving forward with Lucius' hand still on her back, until she stood face to face with death himself. "Dolohov," he called and a large man stood forward. "Is this the girl who's house you raided this summer?"

"Yes my lord," the man spoke and Hermione's heart stopped completely. "She is the Potter boy's friend."

"And, remind us what you did there?"

The man laughed darkly along with several other death eaters, "We had fun, my lord."

The world began to spin for her. Hermione's head clouded and she thought she was going to pass out. She didn't register her surroundings as anger filled her and she just wanted to lash out, but she couldn't move.

The Dark Lord caressed Hermione's cheek where Draco had hit her. His hand was cold and his touched stung more than the hit. She closed her eyes and tried to ward her mind. Voldemort chuckled lightly and grabbed her chin, "There's no use trying to block me out, unless you want to tell me yourself."

Hermione opened her eyes slowly, and looked into his. She felt him digging through her mind and seeing everything she had seen. He saw her thoughts, her dreams, her parent's death. She couldn't push him out of her head, she was too scared, too weak. And when he suddenly pulled away and let go of her chin, her legs gave up all support and her knees crashed to the ground. She cried out in pain and the people around her laughed.

The tears formed slowly, and Hermione fought them back harder than ever. She wasn't crying about the pain anymore. She was sure she was going to die. She looked up watching Voldemort walk back towards his chair, but when she gazed past him her eyes met a man's. His dark hair was over his face, but it was unmistakeable. Voldemort stopped to speak to the man, who kept his face straight as he walked over and picked Hermione up. She could feel him shaking, and that scared her more.

As he pushed her towards the dark lord, he leant down and whispered into her ear, "Just do what he says, and tell him what he wants… I'm sorry."

Hermione could do nothing but nod slightly, just enough for him to notice.

* * *

Severus hated what he was doing, and he knew what he would have to do. He pushed her slowly towards the snake-like man and apologised to her in case it was the only chance he would get.

"Explain to me Severus, what is the use of using the girl, if she has no information about the order?"

Severus nodded, "After the actions of some death eaters this summer, she was too damaged to return to the order."

"And you saw fit to waste your time on a mudblood?" Voldemort's eyes narrowed, and Severus knew he had to play safe.

"I needed to build her trust, and help her get better so she could return to the order, but Dolohov and the rest did more damage than I had expected, it was a foolish plan of theirs, my lord." He said too much.

Severus watched the Dark Lord stand, and his eyes flash in anger. Snape braced himself for the pain he knew he would receive and held quiet as he heard the words Crucio. His body burst into a feeling of flames and every part of him stung and burned. He could hear Hermione screaming for Voldemort to stop and almost as fast as it began, the feeling faded.

From the ground Severus could see the dark lord circling the girl, and he watched Hermione's face fill with fear as Voldemort seemingly inspected her, trailing his finger along her chest and neck. "It seems as if you've won her trust Severus, she truly cares for you," the man laughed as he said this and the rest of the room stayed silent. "You know what I noticed, when I read her thoughts?"

Severus regretted having to ask, "What did you see my lord?"

"You have yet to bed her." Snape could see the icy smirk on the dark lord's face as he walked back to his throne and he watched all the color drain from Hermione's. "Now is as good of a time as any Severus."

"Yes my lord," he nodded and approached the scared girl. Snape collected his thoughts and tried to plan, but nothing could prepare either one for what had to happen. He stood in front of the scared girl, smirking darkly in act and began to unbutton her shirt. He scanned her eyes for any emotion, but all he found was compliance. She understood what was going on, and that neither had a choice. He took off her shirt, and then her pants a little more roughly. He pushed her lightly onto the floor. Severus ignored the excited sounds coming from the men around them, and straddled above Hermione leaning into her ear. "I'll be as gentle as possible, but I still have to be a death eater," he tried to plead forgiveness with his voice. He could feel her heart races beneath him.

She nodded slightly as she felt him pin her arms above her head. "Be whatever you need to be, for us to survive." As he undid his own pants with his free hands, he watched Hermione close her eyes and brace herself.


	12. Chapter 12

Severus sat alone on the couch with his head in his hands. He listened to the crackling of the fire in front of him, but his focus was on the sounds of the shower in the other room. He couldn't believe what happened last night, and he didn't know how to feel. Part of him was devastated that he would pull her into such a surrounding, but another part felt warm and deep towards the girl. He thought back to her face, so composed, eyes closed. She didn't flinch once, didn't change her face even the slightest.

He continued to listen to the sound of the running shower, and tried to imagine what she was thinking about. What could she possibly be thinking?

_You defiled her. Harmed her, and stole her innocence. That was __**you**__ severus._

Snape kept his head in his hands, even when Hermione finished her shower, and walked out in one of Severus' shirt and sweat pants. She sat on the couch beside him, and both remained silent. Besides, what can a person say after a night like they'd had.

"I forgive you," Hermione started. "I know you didn't have a choice."

Severus could feel his heart clench, and he hated her for not being angry. He hated her for being so understanding. Lily, too, was always understanding of things.

Her hair was tied in a wet bun, and his shirt overlapped her figure. He could see small bruises on her arms, and knew there were more on the rest of her body. "How do you feel?" It was all he could manage to ask, and his voice cracked at even that attempt.

"Well, I'm okay, I guess. I could be dead," she laughed slightly trying to lighten the mood but the comment only darkened Snape's face and Hermione sighed. She curled up on the couch and laid her head in his lap. She figured she had passed that comfort point.

"Were you…" He tried to ask but he dreaded the answer. "Did it hurt?" Instantly Hermione knew what he was saying and there was no answer that could possibly make him feel better, so all she did was nod and she felt his whole body go rigid.

They sat in silence. In a deafening silence that was so quiet it screamed in their ears. Hermione listened to the pacing of the man's breath. She waited as eventually it calmed and he stopped shaking. In all honesty Hermione was shocked that something of this nature affected him so deeply. He is a deatheater, and they do these things by habit, don't they? Hermione closed her eyes and breathed deeply. The smell of fresh parchment intoxicated her and she found herself lulled into a relaxed train of thinking; of remembering.

Severus knew he took something from her that night, he saw the pain in her eyes, but he still had to ask. Just in case, and then he wouldn't feel so bad. Now he felt worse. He stole something from her, something that could have been preserved. Something that should have been special. He didn't have to bring her into this whole world and he should have dropped her long ago. She would have been safer. Hermione had been through so much.

Snape could feel the rise and fall of her chest as she breathed. Her head was on his lap and he was glad she still trusted him, enough for that at least. _How did this become your life Severus? _He knew he did what he had to for both of them to survive. Either that, or Hermione would have been killed. At least that's what he told himself. He closed his eyes and listened to her breathing, hoping she would say something to break the silence.

"I find it's getting harder, you know." She finally talked, "to remember my parents." Severus didn't want to say anything to ruin the moment. This was the first time she spoke of her parents besides of their death. "I have pictures, but it's not the same thing. I miss my mother's voice. How she used to tell me how pretty I was even though people always made fun of me."

"You're beautiful," Severus slipped, and began yelling at himself in his head. However, all she did was smile and carry on.

"I took after my dad more though. Every time I saw him, he had his nose in a book. He knew everything, at least I thought until I got my Hogwarts letter. He didn't understand, nor did mum, or I. We thought it was a practical joke or something," she laughed to herself. "We were sure it was a prank, or a promotional ad so my dad threw it out. When we got a second letter the next day, he looked into it some more but he couldn't find any answers of course. That was the only time my father didn't know something."

Severus listened intently to every word she said as she continued to talk, until silence overtook again and he heard the deep sounds of sleep. By then he welcomed slumber with open arms in hopes that everything would disappear when he awoke.

Hermione woke up curled into her professors side. She could feel the slow rise of his chest with every sleeping breath he took. She slowly sat up so she didn't wake him, and left his quarters, conjuring up a sweater that she could wrap herself in until she reached Gryffindor tower. The dark halls were empty as expected, and by the looks of it, it was still night. No doubt Filch was still stalking the halls over winter break, so Hermione made her way quickly towards her tower.

She wasn't sure how she felt about everything, to be honest. She was scared, yes, but she didn't feel like she was in any real danger. However, that could be the adrenaline talking.

"Good evening Miss Granger," a low but clear voice mumbled.

She jumped slightly and spun around. "Oh Professor Dumbledore, uh, hi." She hated being informal however he startled her.

"My apologies, you should never walk up on somebody in deep thought."

Hermione smiled at his sincerity. "That's alright, I was just heading back to the tower."

"Shall I escort you?"

She nodded and they walked in silence for a bit. Quite frankly, she was glad to have company. The halls were... sketchy for lack of a better word. Especially in recent times.

"What brings you to walk the halls so late?" The old man asked, smiling to himself. Somehow, she figured he knew the answer.

"Oh, well..." Hermione shrugged and opted that no answer was better than an awkward one.

"Miss Granger, it doesn't do to dwell on the past. To make the best of our lives, we must look into the future and focus on that, no matter how dark it may seem. To every cloud there is a silver line." She nodded as a response, silent but meaningful. "As well, the things we do for love, and the things we do for survival can be very easily confused. It is that confusion that may test our allegiance to those we care about, ourselves, and the cause."

"The cause?"

"Hermione, I realize the situation you and Severus have found yourselves in, and what a predicament this may be for you. However, as well you should see the silver line I speak of."

Hermione stayed silent. She wasn't sure what Dumbledore was asking from her, yet she had a feeling that it wasn't good.

"The order has been in a bit of a bind, retrieving new information on Voldemort's whereabouts. Severus, as well, has been having trouble. I believe the relationship between you and our potion's professor may serve handy in our battle."

She understood that the headmaster was being sincere, and looking out for the greater good, but it seemed as if his sincerity was selfish and he didn't care at all about the repercussions on both Hermione or Severus. As well, she wondered just how much he knew about the 'relationship' between the two of them, and if Dumbledore had any idea about what had just happened.

As they approached the portrait to the Gryffindor common room, Albus addressed the young girl again. "Miss Granger, if you ever should need to talk, or find yourself in situation beyond your abilities to handle, my door is always open."

"Thank you, professor," she nodded and watched as he strolled away down the staircase humming a Christmas tune to himself before she entered the common room and her quarters.

The headmaster had a point, she would admit, but she wasn't sure what use she could be in the battle. She was simply a pawn, it seemed at least to Voldemort's eyes, and despite how much Severus denied that, she truly wasn't sure anymore. To both Voldemort and apparently Dumbledore, she was just another game piece in their battle, but if she was to fight it wouldn't be for them. She cared about the man, back on the couch, who slept. She hated to admit it, but there was something there that she felt, for the first time, she could hold on to. If she was to fight, it would be for him. To keep him safe, on whatever side he was truly playing for.

As she laid down to sleep, exhaustion took over and her whole body collapsed onto her bed, thankful for the comfort of her own sheets. But there was a small thought tugging at the back of her mind, screaming for her to pay attention.

_Remember who he is, and with whome his loyalties lie, before you foolishly give away your stubborn heart._

And it was on this thought, that she fell into a very deep but very restless sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

A/n: So christmas break means more time to write! YAY! I'm sorry about how long its been taking me :( Reviews are always appreciated though! Hope your having a good holiday season :)

* * *

Hermione stared blankly at the parchment in front of her. School had started again, and they were loaded with papers to write, but her mind was blank and she was tired.

"Drink this," Snape pushed a mug into her hands. He sat down in front of her and watched her carefully.

"What is it?" She asked simply, but took a sip anyways.

"Hot chocolate."

Hermione smiled into her cup. This was how she spent most nights now. Sitting and reading with her potions professor. She enjoyed spending her evenings here, in Severus' quarters. It was quieter than the common room, and easier to study. As well, she just enjoyed the company. Here there were no questions, or pestering about how she was, or what had happened. Just quiet, and relaxation in front of the glowing fireplace.

The dark-haired man opened a book and began to read on the chair across from her. He peered over at her mildly hunched form, musing to himself about her furrowed eyebrows and frustrated manner. Snape had to admit, he hadn't been this comfortable with somebody in a very long time. He was surprised she was as well, taking into account the Christmas break, but he was glad that he had somebody to sit with. Even if it was, at this moment, in silence. As a matter of fact, the two of them usually talked a lot. He felt he knew almost everything there was to know about Hermione Granger. She began to open up and, though sometimes he found it insufferable, when provoked she would talk for hours.

"You know, it's probably unethical working on a paper for my class in front of me," he smirked from behind his book.

She glared playfully up at him. "I've been here all evening working on papers, it's my last one left, and my longest. Not very nice of you, if you ask me."

Severus shrugged, still smirking, "I call it, 'weeding out the weak.'"

Hermione rolled her eyes and turned back to her paper. Though it wasn't often, she found her potions professor had a bit of a sense of humor, as dark as it was. However, that sense of humor was always accompanied by a smirk that made it so she couldn't be mad at him.

She began to write, struggling with the flow of words but figuring she should just finish the stupid paper. She was aware that her professor kept staring at her from over his own reading, if you could even call it that. There was no reading happening at all. "Severus," she put her quill down. "What's the matter?"

The question caught him off guard. He wasn't aware that she knew he was watching her, or that she could tell something was bothering him. He furrowed his own brow and tried to organize his thoughts. He didn't like their conversation the previous night. She told him that she was joining the war along side him, and that she wanted him to teach her helpful spells. He protested naturally. He never wanted to bring her into his battle. It wasn't a place for students, or for her, but she insisted. "Are you sure you want to do this?" He asked finally.

Hermione understood what he was asking and merely nodded. He looked less than pleased, and that was expected. She hadn't told him about Dumbledore approaching her, and asking her personally to fight. That would just make him more angry. As far as Snape was aware, this was all of her own accord.

"Hermione," he sounded like he was almost in pain. "You don't understand what your getting yourself into. Once your in, there's no out, and it's not easy."

"I realize that, but there is no other way Severus. Voldemort knows who I am and what... whatever we are... were in danger. I need to help out."

"This isn't your fight," he almost pleaded and Hermione's heart hurt. He was angry at her, the night before. When she told him what she was doing he got mad, but now he just seemed upset. She stayed silent, which seemed to be the wrong answer. Severus closed his book angrily and walked into his kitchen.

She just stared at her feet for a few minutes, listening to the clinking of moving dishes and cups. Hermione didn't know how she could reason with him, or how she could make him understand. She walked into the kitchen to see the tall man just leaning against the counter. She walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. "I can't lose another person I care about, that's why I'm fighting."

Severus turned around so her face was in his chest, and he wrapped his arms around her as well, burying his face in her hair. He wasn't one to be sentimental, or close, or have feelings. He knew this, everyone knew this. But for the girl wrapped in his arms, she cared about him, and he cared about her. It had been forever since he felt this way about anybody, and the girl previous was long gone. Lost to another war, and that scared him. "I can't lose someone I care about either, that's why I don't want you to fight."

Hermione drew in an inaudible breath as she heard this, and let out a small sigh. "Severus, I have to..."

He tightened his hug around her, "Then I'll start teaching you tomorrow." And Hermione smiled, glad that even though she was sure he didn't understand, he was complying. "For now, you have a paper due." He pulled her from him and kissed her on the forehead, and then pushed her towards the study room door.

* * *

It had been about two weeks since Christmas break, and one week since her lessons with the potions professor had started. She saw him for a lesson nearly every evening after dinner. He taught her the beginnings of darker magic, healing spells, proper occulumency and pretty well anything that Severus saw vital for her to know to survive. Which, in his worried state, seemed to be everything.

Hermione left her professors office after a long lesson, and she opted to go for a walk on the snowy grounds of the school. There was a bit of a breeze outside sending a chill up her spine as she pulled her cloak tighter around her. The grounds were so peaceful at night, and the snow reflected beautifully in the moonlight. Hermione could see a unicorn grazing at the edge of the forest, and she watched it as she walked. Her thoughts were distracted, her mind a whirlwind of ideas and fears. Analyzing and calculating situations was a bad habit of hers, and his words kept ringing in her ears over and over. _'I can't lose someone I care about either.'_

She wanted to believe he cared about her, and she was almost sure he did, but there was doubt. She still felt like just a pawn in a giant chess game, and Voldemort was the opponent's King. She didn't stand a chance. But maybe Snape understood that, and that's why he didn't want her to fight.

She stared out over the lake , and leaned against the bark of a cold tree. She began to drift off into a day dream when she was interrupted by a popping sound beside her. Hermione spun around fast and her stomach sank.

"Hey Granger," a blonde boy popped his gum again and chewed it while smirking. She hadn't seen him since the Malfoy Manor weeks before. He didn't return for the rest of Christmas break, and she hadn't seen him around the castle. Although, Hermione knew she didn't need to worry about him apparating her again as the wards of Hogwarts didn't permit that, she wasn't going to stick around to find out what he was up to. She went to push past the boy but he caught her with an out stretched arm and pulled her back. "It's probably not safe, walking the grounds alone at night you know."

"That's why i'm going back," she tried to move again but his grip was strong.

"Well, I'm here now," he smirked and spun the small girl so that his arm was around her waist and they were both staring at the lake. "Your pretty well safe with me."

She scoffed, "Yeah, you proved that well last time."

"The lake looks magnificent in this light," he popped his gum again ignoring her comment. "I'm sure anything would look magnificent in this light." He spun her around to face him. Hermione hated that he could practically throw her around like a rag doll, but he was strong and Hermione's body was still recovering from the abuse she had put it through for so many months.

"What are you doing Malfoy?" She glared into his eyes.

"Shh," he grabbed her head and pulled her face into his kissing her roughly.

Hermione struggled violently and pulled away, but he pushed her backwards pinning her into the tree. "Stop it Malfoy, get off me!" She screamed, as he bound her hands around a protruding branch that was raised slightly above her head.

"Nobody can hear you here Granger," he brushed her hair from her neck and bit down relishing in her gasp of pain. "My dad told me about what happened at my manor. You know, after I left." He unbuttoned the top few clasps of her cloak so her breasts were just showing. Hermione couldn't believe what was happening. She knew he was right, that nobody could hear her. She was, for lack of a better word, bloody well fucked.

"Ah, so that's why our potions master likes you so much," Draco laughed loudly to himself. "Did you like it? Having him in you? Of course you did, your a whore." He undid the rest of the clasps revealing the rest of her body, the icy cold stinging her skin. "I don't think it's very fair you know... that he gets to have you, and not have to share." Hermione's heart raced out of fear. It was freezing out, but her blood was rushing and her mind wasn't on the cold. The boy grabbed her hips roughly and grinded himself up against her.

Hermione didn't know what to do. Pride saving wasn't an option, every minute she was getting closer to freezing to death, but she would rather die than have him do what she was sure he was thinking. "Draco," she begged. "Please don't do this. Just let me go."

He laughed out loud again, and Hermione saw a twisted glint in his eye. "Oh, I'm not going to rape you Mudblood, but I am going to have a bit of fun. I heard you were quiet when he fucked you in that room. Well, I want to make you scream... just not out of pleasure."

He dug his wand into the skin of her stomach and started writing. Each movement producing more blood as the flesh tore, and she screamed. She screamed in pain, begging him to stop until he finally finished after what seemed like an eternity.

He stepped back to look at his artwork. The words 'teacher's pet' was etched into her soft skin. He approached her and grabbed her face, pulling it so that she was staring him in the eyes. "Tell him, this was me. Make sure he knows what happens when you play both sides of the court."

Draco walked away chuckling to himself and Hermione watched him in painful silence eventually passing out from the pain as he left her exposed and bleeding body still tied to the tree in the whipping wind of the cold night.


	14. Chapter 14

The large oak doors of the hospital wing burst open, and Severus stormed in. "Where is she?" He bellowed frantically looking around at each bed. The hospital wing was empty save for one spot near the far end of the room.

A startled madame Pomfrey, rushed over, stumping herself in front of the man. The witch was tiny in comparison to Snape's height but she wasn't afraid. "Severus... this isn't a good time... she is still weak."

"I don't care," he pushed past the thin witch and rushed over to the farthest hospital bed. "Hermione," he started but he stopped dead at the sight of her. She was pale beyond recognition. All colour left from her face, her eyes dark as if she hadn't slept in years. A sickening feeling entered Snape's stomach. He knew this wasn't natural, that this wasn't her doing. His anger rising at the thought that anybody would harm her.

She turned her head at the sound of his voice and forced a smile, "Hello Professor." Her voice was weak, and breathless. Her body shivering beneath the blanket.

"What the hell happened?" Every attempt Snape normally put to composure was gone at the sight of her. Hermione bit her lip and turned away. She really didn't want to tell him about any of it, including what was on her stomach. She knew exactly how he would react, and it wouldn't be good. "Hermione..." he placed a hand on the sheet right over the cuts and she uncontrollably grimaced.

Madame Promfrey rushed over and grabbed his arm, pulling him away from ear shot from the bed. Hermione watched the two talk. As she saw the blood slowly drain from Snape's face, she too felt more nauseous as she knew this wouldn't end well.

The potions professor couldn't believe what he was hearing. Madame Pomfrey talked slow, "Miss Granger's body has suffered from severe frost bite."

"What happened?" Snape tried to sound professional but there was a slight strain in his voice.

"Hagrid found her by the lake..." the old witch didn't know how to explain the absurd situation. "Miss Granger was tied to a tree, exposed and..." The small witch trailed off. She was unsure how to say what happened, and at the same time was confused about the professor's interest in it. Poppy had known Severus since he was just a boy, and never had she seen him so concerned for someone's well-being.

"...and?"

"Well she was bleeding from several cuts in her abdomen," the witch paled at mentioning this. "None of our potions that we carry will heal them. It seems to have been done with a dark form of magic, that's why I called you."

Snape rushed back to Hermione's side and made to move the blanket but the small girl grabbed his arm. "Severus no..."

He pushed her hand away, ignoring the girls plea and pulled the blanket back. The shock of her stomach made Severus stumbled backwards. In black lettering, almost as if it were burned into her skin, were the words 'teacher's pet'. "What the devil..." Snape's stomach turned, and he held back the nausea that filled him.

"Severus... I..."

Snape just shook his head, and painfully watched as the girls eyes welled with tears. "Who did this?" he questioned trying to fight the urge to yell when she didn't answer. As tears fell down her cheeks a small suspicion picked his brain and he asked, "Was it him?" Her silence was answer enough, and mental pictures of the blonde boy defiling her filled his head. He turned to Pomfry and commanded, "take her to my quarters, I have medicine there to help her." He stormed away without receiving a response and out of the hospital wing.

Anger filled him like never before, and he stalked through the hallways towards the Great Hall. The students would be having breakfast but he didn't care about making a scene. He was half tempted to kill the boy himself. A sick thought of him merely choking the life out of the little rat was satisfying enough.

Not only was he enraged about the act itself, but Snape was baffled as to why the child would do that in the first place. Did he not know who he was dealing with? Severus couldn't care any less about who the boys father was, or who was residing at his home. This was something you just don't do to anybody.

A dark thought made him waver in his pace. _Your a deatheater Severus, it's your life. _"But not hers," he said aloud bitterly.

He pushed open the doors to the great hall, and in an instant the room grew quiet. Severus was a man where people could feel his anger, it engulfed the room like an incense. A looked over to the long Slytherin table and picked out the blonde boy at the edge, smirking, as if waiting for him. With just a look from the dark haired teacher, Draco Malfoy nodded, and strode cooly from the large room and into the halls. The two walked silently through the stone halls, Draco losing his strong posture as the silence grew thicker. After they were a few halls away, Snape grabbed the collar of the boys shirt and threw him up against a wall.

"I thought I told you to stay away from her," the man snarled in the boys face.

Draco tried to look cool, but the tad amount of fear could be seen in his eyes. "Just following orders like the rest of us..."

Severus was done with this idea of dragging Hermione into everything, and he pulled out his wand digging it into the boys neck. "I can make you disappear, and I can make it look like an accident." Draco's eyes flickered from his angry professor's face, to the wand digging into his neck. "Now who's orders were these exactly? The Dark Lord's?"

"Well... th-they weren't orders exactly, more of a suggestion..." The boy replied, and at that Severus lowered his wand.

He knew exactly what that meant, and who's orders those would be. Still holding him against the wall, Snape snarled in his face, "I don't want to see you near Miss Granger again, and I don't need to explain what will happen if you do. Got it?"

The boy nodded, no hint of a smirk, and Severus knew he had to act fast because Draco Malfoy wasn't one to listen to threats, or keep his word.

First stop was to his quarters where he directed Poppy to take the girl. He entered the warded door of his quarters and strode in to find Madame Pomfrey immediately trying to halt him again. "She is sleeping Severus, leave her be."

He didn't need to say anything as he pushed past the thin witch and towards a cabinet that was set in a shelf. He pulled the cabinet open, grabbed a select few vials and made to enter the room, glancing back at Poppy.

"You have five minutes," she said sternly but soft before leaving Snape's quarters.

Severus sat on the the chair beside the bed and watched the sleeping girl. He was beyond angry and knew he would regret what he was about to go do, but he had to see her first.

He caressed her cheek, listening to her slow deep breaths and watched as her eyes fluttered open. "Severus?" Her hand lifted and held his.

"Don't worry Hermione, I just have a few potions for you, then you can go back to sleep."

He handed her the first vial and she drank it obliging. "I'm sorry Severus."

"No, don't apologize for something like this," he handed her the remaining few vials and she drank each one, the last one being a sleep potion that lulled her into a slumber, and Severus was left watching her sleeping form again.

It was an understatement to say that he felt something for the girl, and he knew it was wrong. He was old enough to be her father, that was obvious enough, but mentally she wasn't that age at all. Mentally she had grown from her experiences, but now she was a target. He had made her a target. Snape ripped a piece of parchment from a notepad that was on the table beside her bed, he scrawled quickly and left it folded on her nightstand. As he stood he leaned in and kissed her forehead, apologizing even though he knew she couldn't hear it. He then stalked out of the room, through to the front doors of the castle and to the edge of the grounds before apparating into the night.

The darkness of the mansion loomed before him, but it was a sight Severus had seen many times. He knew the mansions halls as if he'd grown up there all his life, so he knew exactly where the man he was looking for would be. Up two sets of stairs, to the end of a hall, to a room whose light was shining under the edge of the door. Severus didn't bother knocking, he never did anyways so now wasn't the time to start.

He opened the door revealing an elaborate setup. Though the room was at the end of the hall, it extended long enough to be a small apartment. There were two dark leather couches and a fire going in a large stone fireplace. It was almost a scene you would see in a muggle's movie. Out from a room in the back came a tall thin man with long shining blonde hair the same colour of his sons. At the sight of the intruder, one Lucius Malfoy stopped and smiled the icy sly grin he was famous for and said, "I guess this meant you got the message."

It was at those words that Snape lunged towards him, his wand stretched out and pointing at the tall man's face.


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: Sorry for the wait guys... been busy and all :) Anyways, would appreciate some reviews. I think I got like 4 from the last chapter. Honestly, the reviews make me want to write more so if you guy give me some nice ones, perhaps the next chapter will appear sooner rather than later. ;)

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Her eyes were open, but her vision was blurry. Silent tears were running down her cheek and Hermione was at a loss of what to do. Currently, she was sitting upright in Snape's bed, completely alone in the room. She had asked Pomfrey to retrieve some clothes from her own quarters, and took advantage of the spare moments alone to really let it all out. Her body ached on every inch of skin, the faint scars of the words were still etched into her stomach. So desperately she wanted Severus to be there, to hold her, to comfort her.

Hermione's eyes caught the folded paper on the night stand, and she shakily picked it up and read it.

_The score will be settled, don't worry. Don't play by their rules, and trust no one. _

Confused, Hemione's eyes read the second line on the paper.

_Your best defence: "Returtious"_

She didn't get it. Then again, Snape always was a confusing man, but she knew one thing was for certain, he always let his anger get the best of him. He was furious with what had happened, and he knew who did it. He was planning on settling the score. That could only mean one thing.

Hermione's face paled and she leapt out of the bed. She was wearing hardly appropriate clothing for venturing out, but she had to ensure Severus wasn't doing something stupid. Her body ached with every step, and her common sense told her that he was a grown man and fight his own fight. Yet, she practically charged on, conjured a robe, and left the quarters before the nurse witch could return.

As she made her way towards the Slytherin common room, she tried to decipher his note. She wasn't sure who's rules he was talking about, and who she shouldn't trust. Also, what did he mean by her "best defence?"

She approached the common room as a younger student was entering. "Excuse me?"

The student turned and jumped almost shocked at the sight of her. She was well aware of the bruises still on her arms, and her pale look probably made her seem to be a ghost. "Ye...yes?"

"Do you know if Draco Malfoy is in there?"

"He was when I left... about fifteen minutes ago."

"If he is still in there, can you tell him someone is waiting for him outside?"

The young wizard gave Hermione a strange look and agreed, disappearing into the common room. A few minutes later, the blonde boy she so devotingly hated appeared in the doorway, and Hermione's stomach turned. She was so preoccupied with thoughts of saving Severus, that she didn't think about who she was going to see. Flashbacks from the previous night filled her head, and she fought back nausea.

"Miss me already?" Draco smirked, but Hermione could see an almost unsure lack of confidence behind it.

Hermione swallowed her emotions and spoke clearly, her hatred and anger fuelling her voice. "Has he been to talk to you?"

"Lover boy?"

"Shut it Draco," she snapped, and saw the boy flinch slightly. He was worried about something, she could see that. What could have turned his confidence so darkly displayed the night before, into nothing but a nearly shaking child. She never believed a person able to be as cruel as he was, and a small voice in her head hinted that perhaps the sick and twisted boy wasn't exactly Draco in his right frame of mind. "Where is he?"

"Don't bother Granger, it's done. They were only sending him a message... a warning rather."

This time Hermione advanced on him slightly. Something in her snapped, and she lost it. "Yeah, well your message angered him, and now he is after whoever was sending it. I'm asking again Draco, where is he?"

"If I take you there, you'll only be locked up, or worse..." Draco's voice was pleading slightly, for her to back down. "But if you want, we need to go off grounds."

Hermione nodded, and followed the boy through the castle and out the front door. She walked 10 steps behind him to ensure if he tried to attack, she'd have time to defend. Maybe this is what Severus meant by saying trust no one.

Once they got far enough, Draco turned around and Hermione pointed her wand. He reached out his hand, "He is going to kill my father." Hermione just stared at his outreached hand for a moment. "The Dark Lord will kill both of you, if Snape succeeds." She looked into the boys eyes, and the look he had was almost apologetic, but she grabbed his hand before he or she could change their mind.

The two advanced on the dark mansion, and Draco stepped in front of her. Hermione cautiously reached for her wand. The boy took a step back, "Love makes people doing crazy things Hermione, and Snape..." Hermione merely nodded. "They'll be in my father's quarters. Stay close." He turned and continued towards the house.

Hermione knew Draco was concerned for his father, or he wouldn't be helping her at all. If he, of all people, was concerned, then the situation was definitely serious. As they made the way through the halls, Hermione realized her fate. The likeliness of her leaving this house alive was low. If Severus was dead, she was of no use to Voldamort and surely would die, after a lot of other horrific things happened. However, if Lucius was dead, Voldemort would kill them both. She thought of her options, and knew neither ended well. But if there was even the slightest chance both Severus and herself could come out alive, then she would risk it.

Hermione loved him, she knew this. After everything she had been though, he was all she had left, even though she never really had him. She couldn't save her parents, but she could try to save Snape.

As Hermione and Draco reached a large oak door, he pushed it open and both stood frozen and silent, staring at the lifeless body that was laying on the floor.


	16. Chapter 16

Thanks for the Reviews guys! I would appreciate some more. I really love hearing how you guys think my story is going and that you feel so much for the characters. I've worked hard up until here and it means so much to me :) So leave a quick couple of words about whatcha think!

The body lay between the two students and an out of breath man on the other side of the room. Hermione looked at his face, a small cut had let a trickle of blood down the side. At the look of the room, there was a big struggle and by the looks of the blood on the ground, there wasn't time for wands.

"Father...?" Draco pushed past Hermione in the doorway and went kneeling beside the body in the room. He touched the blood at the floor and looked up at Severus. "What did you do?"

Her confidence was frozen as she stared at the scene in front of her. Her eyes locked with the dark man. His hair disheveled, he strode over and grabbed her hand. "You shouldn't have come here."

"Severus, your bleeding," she touched his face and he kissed her forehead.

"We need to leave now," Severus pulled her from the room and she looked back to see the blonde boy hunched over his father.

An elegant figure strode down the hall towards them, and the tall witch grabbed Snape's robes. "Severus, what happened?" But the sad look he returned her with said all he couldn't say and she rushed by as he walked away, Hermione still staring behind as she trailed after him.

At this point Severus broke into a bit of a jog, almost literally dragging Hermione. No doubts that Narcissa had alerted the other death eaters, let alone Voldemort, of Snape's actions, and their chance of escaping was getting slimmer and slimmer.

They ran as fast as they could towards the exit, and Hermione wished they could apparate straight from house but nearly a hundred wards prevented that. The scene was almost like a movie. Death eaters practically formed from the walls, closing in on them in every direction. As spells were being shot at the running pair, Hermione defended them as best she could. However, with Severus still pulling her towards the exit, she seemingly wasn't paying attention to the hall behind her. Suddenly, a hand caught hold of her wrist, yanking her from Snape's grasp and pulling her in. The heavy muscles of a large man wrapped around her, and a wand pressed into her neck. She let out a shriek of pain and fright. As Snape whipped back with his wand drawn out, the wand in Hermione's neck dug deeper, and she was sure it drew blood.

The unmistakable growl of one Fenrir Greyback registered in Hermione's ear, and her heart sunk to her stomach. "If you shoot one more spell, I'll kill her."

Snape scoffed, but lowered his wand. "And who says that she is anything to me?"

Hermione knew he was faking, that it was all a scene, but that comment still hurt... just a tad. She could feel Greyback's breath on her neck, as if he was leaning closer and closer. "Don't play dumb Snape, put it away. The Dark Lord wants to see you."

"Naturally," Snape nodded and walked past Hermione without even a glance. Greyback still holding her tightly, pushed her down the hall and she moved without a struggle. Seemed like a bad idea to mess with a werewolf.

A set of oak doors opened to what seemed to be a completely empty room. Severus entered gracefully, with Hermione being pushed behind him. As if she was the one feared to escape. A few death eaters followed in behind the lot, but the three of them stopped dead centre in the room, and Hermione was dropped instantly. She was determined to keep her composure, if she was going to die, it wouldn't be without a fight.

A dark form appeared in front of the trio out of nowhere, having aparated into the room, and Hermione noticed Severus' body go rigid. She could tell in his face that he was calculating his actions, their chance at survival, but even to her it seemed slim.

The pale figure walked towards them, clicking his tongue as if berating small children. "Tsk tsk, I expected more from you Severus, especially all for a mudblood." The dark lord circled them like a shark circling prey. "I know she is pretty Severus, but why?" He trailed his nail along her neck, sending sickening chills down her spine before returning to face them.

It was all a messed up game. A very messed up psychological mind fuck and Hermione definitely wasn't into it. "He risked my position in the mission. His order was uncalled for," Severus responded smoothly.

"His order was mine." Voldemort said plainly conjuring a chair and sitting comfortable, as if getting ready to watch a show. "Yes Severus, I felt you were getting a little out of line." He looked over at Greyback, and Hermione felt her pushed to her knees, her hair pulled back and a wand forced into her neck. She let out a small yelp of shock, despite her best efforts to keep quiet.

It all happened so fast. Severus pulled his wand out and blasted Greyback from her body, and suddenly every wand in the room was pointed either at her, or her professor.

"A tad protective, are we?" Voldemort chuckled, not bothering to stir from his seat. "Now, why is she so special?"

"She isn't," Snape snapped, his composure breaking a little bit.

"Then why all of the trouble?" Snape didn't respond, so Voldemort continued pushing buttons as he talked. "Is this because you couldn't save Lily? Did you think you could redeem yourself with this girl?"

Hermione was still kneeling on the floor. At the mention of Harry's mom, her heart sank. She knew of the friendship they had, and of the love he felt for Lily, but she never thought herself to be a replacement.

"You know I should just kill you both for all of this, but I'm feeling... generous today," the dark lord continued, and Snape stirred slightly. It clearly was never a good idea for Voldemort to get "generous" and Hermione dreaded his next words. "I think we're going to have a party, and you two will be the entertainment."

The room stirred with excitement from the mumbles of the death eaters behind her, but she knew better than to look. Right now she stared at the floor. It was all over. She was going to die.

"Only one of you will leave this mansion tomorrow evening. Which one, is your decision, but you will duel at tomorrow's dinner, and make it interesting... or i'll just kill you both."

It was sick. It was unrealistic, but it was reality. Hermione's face grew even more pale and she saw a mere flash of emotion in Snape's face before he composed again. Why wasn't he fighting? Why wasn't he defending them? All of these questions ran through her head, even though she knew the answers, as she was pulled out of the room and down a staircase into the dungeons of the mansion.

She was thrown into the cell with a growl from the masked death eater, and shut in nearly complete darkness save from a small light in the hall between the cells. Severus hadn't been dragged behind her. He was left standing alone in the room.

There was nothing in the cement cell. Hermione sat against the wall and buried her face in her knees. She never thought this was how she would see her end. A year ago she was happy. Spending her days with Harry and Ron, having whatever adventures they could find. A year ago life was perfect, and then everything fell apart. An anger rose inside her, and she fought the urge to let out a scream.

She sat there alone for an unknown period of time. Could have been minutes, or could have been hours. She had no idea, but a door opened from down the hall. Light spilled into the dark corridor and voices filled the silence. A fighting body was thrown into the cell across from her, and the hall door slammed shut sending them into the darkness.

Hermione knew who it was, but she had nothing to say. Nothing she could say in a situation like this. She wanted to yell at him. Scream, and tear him apart. But she knew this wasn't exactly his fault... she knew it wasn't entirely his fault. Nearly an hour had passed in silence before she finally heard her name.


	17. Chapter 17

A/N: Hey guys! Thanks for the positive feedback on the last chapter. As the story heads to a close this is getting harder and harder to write, so I appreciate any words of praise or even complaints.. just let me know what you guys think! Thank you!

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"Hermione..."

"Yes?"

"Are you okay?"

Silence.

Her eyes had barely adjusted to the darkness, but Hermione could see Snape's figure outlined at the bars of his cell. Of course she wasn't okay.

The walls of her cell were cold cement, the floor was the same. No window, no light. Just stone. She had been sitting here for hours, and she was freezing. Her life was being played with like a sick and twisted game, and her chances of survival were slim to none. Severus would never let her kill him, and she never would want to. At this point, she was as good as dead.

So of course she wasn't okay.

"I'm sorry Hermione."

Silence.

What was she to say to him? That everything was fine? That everything was okay? That she was ready to die? Her heart was torn, her mind was practically mush. She could hardly think, let alone speak. All she was filled with was anger and sadness. Heartache. She loved him, and he couldn't love her back. But there was no use dwelling on that thought, because within the next 24 hours, that won't even matter.

"Do you still miss her?" Hermione asked blatantly. She needed something to keep her mind off of her impending death.

It was Snape's turn to be quiet. He pressed his forehead on the cold bars of the cell and sighed. "Every day," he finally responded.

"Will you miss me?"

"I won't have to, because you wont be the one who is gone."

Hermione scoffed. She didn't believe a word.

"Do you remember what was on the note I left?" Snape asked, his voice strained and Hermione could hear the pain even in his words.

_Returtious... _Hermione thought to herself, and she nodded. "Yes," she replied realizing he probably couldn't see her.

"Good..."

They were left in their silence, in their darkness, in the oblivion of their individual minds. Somewhere, somehow, Hermione dozed into a restless slumber.

* * *

It was dark, everything was dark, and Hermione was alone. The room seemed to extend for miles, but she couldn't see so she ran. She ran and ran through the darkness, but it continued for an eternity. She was alone. After what seemed like a lifetime, she crashed to her knees and began to sob. Her cries echoed through the room as if bouncing off the non-existent walls around her.

To her right a door opened emitting a bright light into the room. Hermione looked up, wiping the tears from her face. She didn't want to go, but something told her to get up, and she followed her concience slowly moving her way to the door. She leaned on the doorway for support. Her legs were numb from running, and her breath was short.

The room was filled with people, all smiling in her direction. A party for her, and Hermione was under-dressed. She looked down and noticed she suddenly was wearing a knee length black dress. She vaguely wondered how she got it, but brushed it off. It was a party for her, and she was seemingly late.

As she entered the room, people approached her. They shook her hand, hugged her, and told her she was beautiful. She thanked them all, one by one, but she was distracted. Hermione was looking for him. As she broke through the crowd he was there.

He was standing alone, but smiling straight at her. Their eyes met and her heart jumped. He was wearing a suit, and looked pristine. His black hair, his dark eyes. He was hers.

Hermione stopped a few feet away from him. He approached her, catching her hips and pulling her in. They danced slowly, just staring into each others eyes. It was as if nobody else was in the room. She leaned her head on his shoulder and his on hers. He smelled intoxicating as they rocked back and forth. Hermione could hear his breath in her ear, and he began to kiss her neck, but when he whispered her name his voiced hissed.

Her stomach dropped and she gasped pushing him back. His face transformed into pale skin, and snake eyes. He smirked darkly, and she suppressed a scream. Suddenly noise broke out behind and she turned. Black cloaks floated around the room, casting spells around, and people screamed as their bodies dropped to the floor.

She backed away, and the snake-man stared, the smirk placed firmly on his lips. But she hit a wall, and it was too late. He raised his wand...

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"Wake up!" A voice growled stirring Hermione from her sleep. The figure unlocked the cell door before her eyes had time to adjust to the darkness, picking her up and dragging her from the room. She hadn't had a chance to see if Severus was still in his cell, but her mind was boggled and she could hardly think.

"Where are we going?" She stammered, struggling to keep up with the man. As they left the room, she noticed it was a death eater that she didn't recognize. He was young, attractive, and Hermione felt pity that he was one of them.

"The Dark Lord requires that you prepare for his party," he responded coldly as he pulled her through the halls.

_The party... that explains the dream. _She thought, but it didn't explain it one bit. Fear filled her as she was pushed into a room, and the door closed behind her.

The room was lavish, to say the least. The walls were dark red, and the floor mohogany. There were beautiful leather couches facing a lit fireplace on one side, and a dark but elaborate vanity against a nearly empty wall on the other. Sitting on the couch was a tall woman recognized as Narcissa Malfoy as she stood to greet the shaking Hermione.

"Good afternoon Hermione," the elegant woman approached her, towering several inches over her petite figure. "The Dark Lord has asked me to make you presentable for the evening."

Hermione nodded. That was the only thing she could think to do. Here stood the woman, whose husband was just murdered. Murdered for Hermione. And Narcissa wasn't able to mourn, but had to still do the bidding of her master.

"I have a dress for you," Narcissa opened a wardrobe and pulled out a long red dress handing it to Hermione. "You may shower and change in the washroom." The woman motioned to a doorway and returned to the couch.

Hermione held the dress with shaking hands, and entered the bathroom. The bathroom was equally elaborate. Mirrors were ceiling to floor, with a long marble sink along one side. A standing shower in one corner, and a long tub in the other. She took her clothes off slowly and entered the shower relishing in the feeling of the running water down her skin. This would be the last time she would feel anything.

Hermione reflected on her year. She had come so far from last summer, and it was all going to be over. She almost wished Severus had let her fall from the tower. It would have been a quick end. An easy end. Yet, at the same time, she was glad that she had the time with Severus. He had become a huge part of her life, and that was something she couldn't regret.

It took a long while for her to finish the shower, and after she dried herself she stood in front of the mirrored walls and just stared wearily. She had gained weight over the course of the year, but she was still thin. Her figured more filled to fit the rest of her body. Her hair was tamed and lightly wavy even while wet. She couldn't believe that just months ago her body was a wreck, deteriorating along with her mind.

She put on the red dress that she was given. It fit perfectly along her curves. The cleavage was cut deep, and a slit was along the side of the leg, cut up to her thigh. The back hung low, just above her tailbone. She looked stunning. _What a waste._

This was cruel. Every single part of it. She was dressed up for her own funeral, and she knew it was to show Severus just what he was about to lose. The thought stabbed her chest violently, and she fought back every urge to hurl.

There was a light knock on the door. "Hermione, are you ready?" A light females voice travelled through. The question was a joke naturally, how in the world could she be ready. Hesitantly she opened the door, but rather than a pleasant smile, she was greeted with a pained stare. "We need to fix your hair, and we are running out of time."

Narcissa guided Hermione to the vanity and sat her down. Without a single complaint, Hermione watched as the woman set to work drying and curling her hair until long tendrils cascaded down the back and front. There was no use in resisting anymore, and she knew it. She opted to take her fate, and be strong.

"I apologize on behalf of my family," Narcissa began. "Fear does damage on ones mind, and fear is all any of us have." Hermione stayed silent, watching the woman through the mirror. "I know Severus better than any, and his intentions were of nothing but love."

Love... the word ran through Hermione's mind. Love didn't seem possible, but it was the only explanation. The preferred explanation.

As Narcissa finished her work, she lifted Hermione from the chair. She was trembling on her feet and the woman had to support her. "The dinner will be in a few, I'll walk with you down." They reached the door despite her weak legs, and Hermione gladly accepted the offered hand of the woman who had just prepped her for death. She couldn't do this alone.

The walk through the halls seemed long and drawling. The men who passed her in the hall stared with hungry eyes, and it made Hermione's stomach churn. She would be the entertainment tonight. It all was for show.

Slowly they approached a set of large oak doors, and Narcissa knocked. Hermione could hear voices, many voices, coming from inside the room. As the door handle clicked and it opened slowly, bright lights filled the dark hall. Hermione took a deep breath, Narcissa's hand still tightly held in hers, and slowly she entered to meet her fate.


	18. Chapter 18

A/N: SORRY for the wait! Read and Review as always PLEASE.

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It was a party for her. The doors swung open to a bright light and everyone in the room stared. It was just like her dream; only it wasn't. The men's eyes were hungry, filled with desire. The women's eyes were jealous, and wary. Only they wouldn't be jealous, as she was the one who was going to die.

Narcissa placed a hand on the small of her back and pushed Hermione into the room. The room was huge, like a banquet hall and elaborately decorated. Torches as lighting along the wall, stone flooring, creepy paintings and statues... it was definitely unnerving. She was pushed through the hall towards the table in which everybody was already seated.

Only two chairs were empty, obviously for them. Voldemort stood at his throne on the farthest end of the table. To his right sat Severus, who stared at Hermione intently, his emotion unreadable. She looked for something in his eyes. A sign of reassurance maybe? But instead found a darkness, an emptiness, and cold.

Narcissa guided Hermione to the chair on the left of Voldemort and sat her down. She then took the remaining seat at the table, and everybody waited in silence for Voldemort to address the crowd.

"Tonight," he started, his voice low but carrying, "is a night of reward, and celebration. The recent mission faced by our men was a success, and success should be rewarded should it not?" Few murmured in agreement. "But first, we eat."

On the table appeared a lavish feast of anything and everything that the heart could desire. However, Hermione wasn't hungry and the last thing she was thinking of was stuffing her face. The dinner couldn't go any longer, quite literally. It had been nearly two hours of people eating and chatting, and the suspense was killing her. She knew that it was Voldemort's plans to mess with their heads, she just didn't figure he was a man of dramatics.

Throughout the dinner, Severus barely glanced her way. He was sitting across from her, and did everything in his power, it seemed, to not look at her. Hermione remained silent, pushing the food around her plate. Her mind was made up, now she just needed the courage to go through with it.

Slowly, one by one, the parties at the table got up and started to mingle. A band, having literally appeared out of nowhere, began to play a slow waltz-like music, and many began to dance. Hermione had hardly noticed she was the only one left at the table, when she felt a light tap on her shoulder. She spun around quickly to find her potion's professor holding out his hand.

"Care to dance?" he smiled, though his eyes held no happiness.

Hermione silently nodded and took his hand. Severus guided her to the dance floor and immediately merged into the crowd. His right hand on the small of her back, his left holding hers. They danced elegantly to the music, and Hermione tried to imagine it was just them.

"You look beautiful."

Hermione blushed.

"How are you feeling?" He asked her, his voice barely more than a whisper.

"I'm fine."

"You may be good at pretending, Miss Granger, but don't lie to me."

She knew her shaking voice, and her face couldn't hide it anyways, "I'm scared."

"Me too Hermione," he replied, and they continued to dance. Hermione wasn't sure if she had heard him right. The great Severus Snape was afraid? Surely it shouldn't come as a surprise, he was human, but Hermione never saw him as anything less than someone who could carry the weight of the world on his shoulders.

They danced around in silence for what seemed like eternity. It felt like it was just the two, in a bubble that blocked out the rest of the world.

"Hermione, I have to tell you something..." She looked up into his dark eyes and he held her gaze. "We don't have much longer clearly, and I wanted to say that I haven't let myself feel much of anything for anybody in a long time, but with you... Hermione... I..."

A light but brisk cough broke the bubble and the pair stopped dancing to look at the intruder. The dark lord stood his hand reached out to Hermione in offering. "May I?"

Hermione hesitated, but she knew it wasn't a question, it was a command. She nodded, and her stomach turned violently as she let go of Severus' hand, and took the hand of the man she hated most.

They broke into a waltz, and merged into the crowd, much like she had with Snape before. However, Hermione eyes looked past the man in front of her, to her professor who now watched her closely from the other side of the room. His eyes warning her to be careful of her words.

"You have done well this evening, Miss Granger," the Dark Lords icy voice drawled, and she was forced to look into his snake-like eyes. Hermione merely nodded. "You've played well, and pleased me." She didn't know what to say, and had to concentrate to keep her breathing steady. Her mind was screaming at her to run, and run fast, but she knew she couldn't so she just danced. She could feel his long cold fingers on her lower back that replaced the warm ones that were there moments ago, and the music played on.

"I have a proposition for you Miss Granger," once again she was forced to look in his eyes. "Your academics do not go unnoticed in the wizarding world, and your talents are made aware of. So join me," he stared at her intently as surprise washed over her face.

"What?"

"Intellect is a key to power, and power is what is needed in life. So join me and my death eaters Miss Granger, and both you and Severus will go free."

Hermione glanced quickly at Severus who was still watching carefully. She loved him, with all her heart, and the option to have him safe was tempting. But Hermione Granger a death eater? She shook her head and hardened her face. "There is no freedom in darkness."

A sly smile came over the Dark Lord's face, "Such wise words from such a foolish girl, but very well then." He let her go and walked away, leaving her standing in the middle of the dance floor in a stunned silence.

What did she do?

"May I have everyone's attention," the music stopped and the crowd turned to see Voldemort standing beside a throne like chair covered in red satin. Hermione felt a pair of hands on her shoulders and she looked up to see a focused Severus staring at the pale man in front of them. As the crowd quieted, the Dark Lord took his cue, "I believe the celebrations are over, now is time for rewards."

Hermione felt the hands on her shoulders tighten, and her heart began to race.


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: Thanks for reading up to this point everyone, the story isn't done. Let me just say, this was incredibly hard to write, and my heart is breaking with every word. Please let me know what you guys think! Read and Review 3

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Hermione stared straight, her body rigid. A silence was over the crowd as the dark lord spoke, but Hermione didn't listen. Her mind elsewhere. The hands on her shoulders holding her tight, seeping away some of the fear, she wasn't alone. Yet, she couldn't help but feel that this was the end. It was obviously her that was going to be finished. Was she ready?

Worst of all, it seemed like Voldemort was only prolonging her suffering. A man with so much power, could afford all the dramatics sure, but Hermione never figured he was one to put on a show.

"The recent mission by our men was a success, and they shall be awarded accordingly," his eyes twinkled darkly and he gestured towards the back of the hall. "Open the doors." The crowd turned and watched a long line of women being led into the hall. Some of them looking badly beaten, and all of them broken down into submission.

Hermione let out a slightly audible gasp. The sight before her was ghastly. The Dark Lord proceeded to call out several men's names as they each, one by one, stepped forth to take their pick. For what, Hermione didn't want to know, but didn't have to ask. The wives, or party guests of each man looking utterly indifferent.

As the last girl was picked, and taken into the crowd, Voldemort's eyes laid on Hermione. Her heart quickened pace, but her face was hardened. She wouldn't go down without at least a fight.

"Before I dismiss you all to enjoy your party favors, we have one last surprise for all of you. A lesson, shall we say. Severus," he gestured towards the two. "Please step forward."

Snape let go of Hermione's shoulders and stepped forward. She felt as if he took her heart with him. The crowd parted, allowing him to approach and leaving a wide open space between Hermione and him. "Severus, my boy, you have betrayed me, that much is true. And for what?"

"I am sorry my Lord," Snape knelt down, his head bowed.

"That is fine, but doesn't change what is done. Explain yourself."

"I let my anger get the better of me, my Lord. Lucius involved himself in my mission, and impeded it greatly." Severus remained low, and hardly lifted his head as the Dark Lord stood and made his way towards Hermione.

"And the young girl here had no effect on your actions Severus?" The Dark Lord circled her, his wand tip trailing along her body and pressing into her lower back. "It wasn't your concern for her that pushed you... over the edge?"

"No my lord."

"What are your feelings towards her Severus?"

There was only a moments hush as Severus still knelt in place, unmoved. "She is a part of the mission my lord. A piece of the puzzle. She means nothing." Hermione knew he was lying. He had to be. But it hurt her nevertheless to hear it.

"So, if I was to..." Voldemort stopped in place, his facial expression one of pure bemusement. "Crucio."

The pain was agonizing, and took her off guard. Hermione screamed as the feeling of her skin burning filled her whole being. Her bones were breaking, her skull crushed in, and she could feel everything. As her eyes blurred she watched Severus stay still, kneeling in place, not moving a muscle. Then it stopped, the pain ceased, and she lay out of breath sweating on the cement floor.

As the ringing in her ears ceased she could hear the crowd was laughing, snickering, and cackling at her pain. Hermione struggled to pick herself back up, and even as she wobbled on her feet, she decided she wasn't going to let them win.

Voldemort smirked at her persistence to stay strong. "I will give you one last chance to redeem yourself Severus." Hermione watched as Snape stood and faced them, his own face blank, but his eyes showing just a bit of concern. So slight that Hermione was unsure anyone else could notice. "The mission you were on is over, due to Lucius' reckless actions, so the girl is useless. Dispose of her and I'll see to your forgiveness."

Hermione closed her eyes for only a second and took a breath. She watched Voldemort pull her wand from his robes and hand it to her. "Like leading a lamb to the slaughter, that's all this was." He smirked again.

"And if I win?"

The Dark Lord's smile faltered only slightly. "I'll set you free, as promised."

Hermione knew a promise from the Dark Lord always came with conditions, or it wasn't a promise at all, but she didn't care. It was all for show, and if she only had minutes left to live, it was going to be a good one.

Severus stepped forward, his wand in his hand, his face blank and cold. Hermione stood still, her red dress brushing her legs, her hair dishevelled from torture, and her wand tightly held in her hand. They stared, taking the silence as a moment to speak through their eyes. His said he was sorry, and she only hoped he could read hers.

He nodded slightly, and shot a spell. She nearly missed deflecting it despite the warning, and the duel began. It was mostly Severus aiming at her. Flashes of light she would just barely shield, shot mere seconds apart as they waged a war. She couldn't fight back.

She grew weary as spell after spell shot at her, and her deflections became less and less timed. She was tired. Tired of fighting, and hiding. Tired of being afraid and upset. Tired of everything that had gone on in the last year, and in her final moments alive it was getting to her.

A spell caught her in the chest and sent her flying back. She landed roughly on the pavement in a crumpled heap. This was it. She got up, her emotions rising into anger. "Is that all you've got?" She strode back as confident as she could until she was only ten feet away from her lover-turned-murderer. "Is that all you can do?" She shot a stunning spell back, that was easily deflected.

Snape's laugh was cold and mocking, "Miss Granger, you are nothing but a child."

Hermione tried to ignore his words but, even though she knew he didn't mean any of it, it fuelled her anger. She shot several spells again and all were easily diverted.

"There is not a thing you learned in that pathetic excuse of a school that can save you," he snarled. She remembered the words scrawled on the paper he left at her bed side. _Your best defence._

She didn't know what the spell did, or how it would help, but as she began to hear the words of the killing curse leave her professor's lips, Hermione screamed the word, with her wand out-stretched, "Returtious!"

A bright fuchsia light escaped her wand and collided with the green light that was flying at her. It filled the room bright, and as her eyes began to refocus, she noted she was still alive. Her heart beating quickly, her body still sore, but she was alive. She gazed around the silent room, the look of annoyance but amusement on the Dark Lord face. Hermione followed his gaze to the black heaped body on the floor and felt her heart stop. Realization dawned on her, and although she was angry, her heart was broken.

She killed him. Hermione killed him with a spell he gave her. He knew she would use it, and took his own life. Took his own life to save hers.

Voldemort stepped over Snape's motionless body and approached her. "Pain is a source of power Miss Granger, but only the strong can harness it. My offer still stands... think about it." She glared into his eyes but remained silent. "Narcissa," the Dark Lord ordered. "Take Miss Granger here back to Hogwarts."

She watched the blonde woman approach her, and let her take her hand. But even as Narcissa guided her from the room she stared listlessly at the body on the floor, wanting more than anything to hold him, and show the world that someone deeply cared for Severus Snape.

Her heart was shattered hurting so bad she couldn't feel the pain in the rest of her body. The pair exited the mansion and disapparated to the forbidden forest on the edge of the castle grounds. Narcissa left her there with a curt goodbye, and dissappeared into the night air.

As Hermione walked to the castle silently alone, the cold night air biting her skin, tears flowed down her cheek and a voice in her head told her that the battle wasn't over.

_My offer still stands... think about it. _


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: I know the chapter is short, but theres not much left to say, its an ending. And it was hard to write. I hate endings. Anyways, read it and review. Tell me what you think. Should there be a sequel? Shouldn't there? Ya know what to do!

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"I am truly sorry for the loss Miss Granger. Severus was a good man," the tall old wizard stared at Hermione over his half-moon spectacles. "If there is anything I can do, let me know."

Hermione scoffed slightly knowing full well that if there was something he could do, the old man wouldn't do it unless it was for the greater good. "Thank you headmaster." She just stared in her lap at the red silk dress she still wore. It was ripped, and torn, but none of that mattered. After having arrived at the castle Hermione immediately headed to the headmaster's office to report what had happened. At least, the abridged version.

She wasn't about to disclose her 'relationship' with the professor, whatever it was, or the offer that Voldemort had made her. To somebody like Dumbledore, that offer would only be opportunity and she knew that Severus wouldn't want her to become a pawn in another of Dumbledore's schemes. Severus... who wasn't here to protect her anymore. She couldn't help but loathe the old wizard in front of her, feeling that this was partly his fault.

Behind her, the oak doors to the office swung open and Hermione didn't need to turn to know who it was. "Where is she?" Her dark-haired friend came barrelling into the office closely trailed by his ginger side-kick. "Hermione!" He threw his arms around Hermione's shoulders, and she cried out slightly at the pain throughout her body, causing her friend to coil back.

"It's fine Harry," she tried to smile. "I'm just sore."

"What happened? Why are you dressed that way?" Harry's eyes scanned her thoroughly and then he looked to his headmaster for answers.

"Mr Weasley, why don't you escort Miss Granger to the hospital wing to be attended to, while Mr Potter and I discuss some important matters.

Ron held his hand out for Hermione to take, and she readily complied, thanking the headmaster for the dismissal and allowing Ron to guide her out.

They walked through the hallways hand in hand, Hermione just glad to not be alone. "Are you okay?" Ron broke the silence, giving her hand a slight squeeze.

"I'll be okay," she nodded and squeezed back.

The two walked towards the hospital wing, and Hermione relished in the quiet of the hallways late at night. Her red dress brushing against her legs as they walked, her bare feet making no noise on the stone floor.

Hermione knew she meant what she said. She would be okay, eventually. But right now, there were things to be done, and people to be taken care of. The war wasn't over, for Hermione it had just begun. And now, without Severus around, she was fighting alone.

Voldemort didn't lie when he said that pain is a source of power, and Hermione was determined to show him just how true his statement was. Even if it was the last thing she did.

_I'll get them for you, Severus. Every last one._

**THE END**

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**Epilogue**

Severus awoke with a start, as something pounded into his stomach. He sat up fast, startling the rabbit that had jumped onto him and scaring it into the forest bush. His breath was heavy as he gasped for air, feeling like he hadn't breathed in days. His brain was fuzzy and his body stiff, as if he had been in a slumber for months.

After a few weak moments, he pulled himself to the river bank, drank in deep gulps of icy cold water, and then forced himself to his feet. He looked around. Bodies lined the riverbank of sorely beaten women, tortured children and men. All in undergarments, including himself, and all a bloody mess. He knew they left him half naked, so that in the event that his body was found, he would be assumed to be a muggle. On that note, his wand was nowhere to be seen.

Severus knew the death eaters would dump his body here, as they did with everyone, allowing the high tide to sweep them off into the ocean. He was the one who had found this place, it was ironic that he would find himself here. The sight before him was a mess, and without notice he wretched up all the contents of his empty stomach. He had no idea how long he had been unconcious, but considering the state of the bodies, it couldn't have been more than a couple of days.

He brushed himself off and began to walk along the river. He needed to build strength in his body before apparating, noting to himself that he was lucky to not need a wand for that magic. As he walked, his mind whirled, memories of his last woken moment flooded him. His heart clenched thinking of how he left Hermione defenceless, and hoped to whatever higher power that she was alright. If he knew the Dark Lord well enough, he knew Voldemort would keep Hermione alive, seeing a value in her ability to destroy his right-hand man. Voldemort longed for power, and Hermione had a lot of it, even if she didn't know it quite yet.

Severus sat on a rock, and put his head in his hands. He needed to think. He was a dead man now. The only option to start a new life, but how, he wasn't sure. He would go back to his apartment, hoping the Death Eaters had yet to rummage his home, and collect some things. That was about all he had planned. In all honesty, he wasn't sure the spell he gave Hermione would work. It was untested and dangerous, so he hadn't thought his plan this far ahead.

The only thing he knew for sure was that the war wasn't over, and that Hermione Granger was now an integral part of it. He couldn't lose her. So Severus Snape opted to do something he never did, and follow his heart.

He had to find Hermione Granger, and if it was the last thing he did, he had to make sure that she stayed alive.


	21. Author's Note

Author's Note Changes

First of all, I want to thank all of my readers for their continuous support through the two years of work this fan fiction took. All of your reviews and positive feedback gave me the push it took to actually finish this.

Anyways, I'm making this author's note to inform you all that there WILL now NOT be a sequel to this story. I will be entirely honest, the last chapter in this story will change. This isn't how i wanted it to end at all, and i got a very honest review from a reader that made me realize that.

I PROMISE , however, that you will still be seeing more of my work soon!

As well there will be a totally different fan fiction that I am going to write with a juicy plot, and lots of smut ;)

So hold tight everybody and wait to be mind blown! :)

Favourite me as an author and set up an author alert so you can hear when my new stories come out!

As well, I will be looking for a reliable beta-reader, so if you may be interested, PM me and we can figure it out.

Once again, thank you everybody for your support.

As well, this fanfiction will be undergoing renovations is the editing and grammar department. Thanks for you support once again.


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